I Used to Say...

I thought it might be fun (and humbling) to start a running list of things I used to say I would never do, my kids would never do, or other edicts I issued along similar lines. I'll just republish this list occasionally with new ones added. I should point out that these charming assessments of the way my life would look once I had a husband and children were usually formed and voiced with my similarly single friends during and after college as we watched our newly married friends become parents themselves. Somehow, pre-marriage and pre-kids, we have all the wisdom of the ages, right? When reality hits, it's often hard to know what was a legitimate (i.e. Biblical) goal and what was just nuts!

1. My kid will never throw a tantrum at someone else's house.
2. My kid will eat her/his vegetables without complaining.
3. My kid will go to bed (or to nap) without issue because that's just the way it will be. We'll raise him/her to be like that.
4. My kids will never eat in the car.
5. My kids won't eat hot dogs frequently--what poor nutrition (I should point out here that I stock up on hot dogs when they're on sale...).
6. My kids will all love to read (thankfully, one does so far and the other two might come around).
7. I will never do natural child birth (before I decided to do natural child birth with my first).
8. I will never have a medicated delivery (after natural childbirth with baby number one and before I got pregnant with babies number 2/3 and had a vaginal delivery followed by an emergency C-section).
9. I will never have a blog.
10. My kids will never watch TV, certainly not until they're at least 2.
11. My kids will be toilet trained easily.
12. My kids will obey me in the park and come when I call.
13. I'll never threaten and not follow through.
14. I'll never bribe my kid to eat dinner by offering dessert as a reward.
15. We'll never have toys strewn about the house--how hard can it be to pick everything up before someone comes over?
16. I'll lovingly guide and nurture my children at all times; no yelling in this house (ha ha ha ha).
17. I won't lower my standards for babies after child #1 (well, let me tell you--the floors didn't get mopped daily when the twins started crawling; the twins haven't been read to every night of their little lives; the twins haven't had any professional photos taken; etc.)
18. I'll only breast feed my babies. (never anticipated twins; tried it and had to give it up)
19. I'll make everything from scratch.
20. I'll regain my pre-pregnancy shape easily because I'll exercise (when? What was I thinking? what's exercise?)

There are lots more! Feel free to comment with some of your own "I used to say..."