Savoring a Cup of Tea: Colossians 1:9-14

This is a terrific passage to pray through for yourself, your husband, your children, family members, friends, .... It says it all. This is one that Sharon Jaynes, author of Becoming the Woman of His Dreams, recommends praying for your husband. I pray this for my children and myself, too! I certainly need endurance and patience with joy. I'd love my children to be filled with the knowledge of his will in all wisdom and understanding. What a delight if our family all walks in a manner worthy of the Lord!

⁹And so, from the day we heard, we have not ceased to pray for you, asking that you may be filled with the knowledge of his will in all spiritual wisdom and understanding, ¹⁰so as to walk in a manner worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing to him, bearing fruit in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God. ¹¹ May you be strengthened with all power, according to his glorious might, for all endurance and patience with joy, ¹² giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in light. ¹³He has delivered us from the domain of darkness and transferred us to the kingdom of his beloved Son, ¹⁴ in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.

Savoring a Cup of Tea: 1 Corinthians 13

Posted by Betsy

This passage is standard fare at weddings, on Christian Valentine's Day cards, and in collections of Scripture passages. But how many of us really meditate on this passage, pray through it, or seek to apply it to our own families? Paul gives us no qualifiers on this statement of Christian love. There is no "love is patient except when little Johnny is refusing for the 50th time to eat his peas." Or, "love keeps no record of wrongs except when hubby forgets my birthday again." Or "it is not irritable except when you don't get enough sleep the night before." No. Paul writes this beautiful statement of what love is with no qualifiers. Pray through this passage, asking the Lord to enable you to love those within your own home first. (Passage from ESV and copied from Bible.com)

¹If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. ²And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. ³ If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.

⁴ Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant ⁵or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; ⁶it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

⁸Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away. ⁹For we know in part and we prophesy in part,¹⁰but when the perfect comes, the partial will pass away. ¹¹When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I gave up childish ways. ¹²For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I have been fully known.

¹³So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.

No-Frills-Limited-Selection Grocery Stove v. Huge-Giant-Super-Sized-1-City-Block-Mega Grocery Store

A new Kroger recently opened in my part of town. Yippee, right? Our old Kroger was pretty old. 40,000 square feet and certainly ample for our needs, but not for our wants (other Krogers had artisan bread, sushi counters, fresh fish/seafood, and pretty flowers). So, when the new Kroger was being advertised, I was elated: closer to my house, bigger (83,000 square feet), bulk food, organic food, better produce, etc. etc. etc.

Guess what? I shop at Aldi more than ever now. Why? I daresay Carrie would echo the following sentiments, but these thoughts spring from a conversation I had with my sister-in-law, Erin, over Christmas. She is also lugging a toddler through the grocery store, trying to feed her family healthy and economically, and doesn't want to make any more trips to a grocery store than necessary (just like Carrie and me).

Why is the huge-giant-city-block-sized grocery store not my favorite? Why do I shop at places like Aldi, the produce store down the road, and even the Chinese grocery store? Some things to consider:

1. Smaller store means fewer choices which invariably helps my grocery budget (not as much temptation to buy things not on the list!)
2. Smaller store means shorter shopping trip (a bonus if you're dragging young children along).
3. Smaller store means less distraction for kiddos--not as my toys/candy/etc. to induce cries of, "Mommy, can we get that?"
4. Smaller store means easier kid-management for the kids that are old enough to walk with you. After all, they can only get 1 or 2 aisles away and you can still them even if they're "across the store."
5. Smaller store means more friendly staff. The same few people work there and you get more personalized attention or at the very least, a friendlier cashier. (In fact, this morning my produce store folks gave me free apples and significantly reduced bell peppers; this happens frequently. Of course, I've been shopping there roughly once a week for 4.5 years and the same folks have worked there the whole time.)

Ironically enough, Sam's is another place I don't mind shopping when I have my kids along. It's actually a similar experience to the others except that I'm doing more walking. The aisles are so industrial that there are few impulse buys targeted to kids (with the exception of the gigantic candy aisle that I avoid). I can get in and out in a predictable amount of time and am not swayed to buy (too many) things that aren't on my list.

If you're dreading grocery store shopping and/or need to find a better solution for your family, consider 1 or 2 trips to smaller stores during the week and a big stocking up trip to a mainstream grocery store 1 or 2 times a month. You might be surprised at how much better things go even though it seems counterintuitive to shop at a store with limited selection.

Savoring a Cup of Tea: Philippians 2: 1-11

Posted by Betsy

Yesterday, I mentioned the need to pray through Scripture. It helps us pray for the things that really matter, for one thing. Another benefit is that we KNOW these things are what God wants. For instance, take the famous Philippians 2 passage about having the same attitude as Christ. Have you prayed through this passage for yourself? Are you looking to the interests of those in your household as you look to your own? Are you seeking to be a bondservant for those in your household? Are you putting others (in your own household) above yourself? Are you considering them more significant than yourself? I really fail in some of these areas--after all, aren't I important, too? Well, this is what the Lord has called us to be like. In this day and age of "me time," get reoriented by praying through Philippians 2: 1-11. Feel free to make pronouns more personal. Feel free to insert specific names in place of generic words such as "others." Here it is, in the ESV, copied from Bible.com (a terrific resource--you can print off any passage!). I added the italics.

¹So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, ²complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. ³Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. ⁴Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. ⁵ Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus,

⁶ who, though he was in the form of God,

did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped,

⁷but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant,

being born in the likeness of men.

⁸And being found in human form,

he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death,

even death on a cross.

⁹ Therefore God has highly exalted him and

bestowed on him the name that is above every name,

¹⁰so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow,

in heaven and on earth and under the earth,

¹¹and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord,

to the glory of God the Father.

New Year's Goals 2010

Posted by Betsy

Last year I wrote a post about making New Year's goals as opposed to New Year's resolutions. This year, I thought I'd post some of my personal goals for this year (and the goals of our family). I like to keep it simple: 1-3 goals per category. We focus on the most important/desired outcomes.

A Key Theme for me here is to use what I have, keep it simple, and focus on the important stuff. We could reorganize our house and buy lots of new organizing stuff in the process... or use what we have. I could buy new clothes, or lose 5 pounds and gain an existing closet-ful of stuff I already like. I could reinvent the wheel with a new Bible-reading plan, but I'm going to stick to the homework for my group Bible study for now (since it gets me into the Word 6 days a week!). Etc.

Spiritual:

• pray DAILY
• read Westminster Confession and study guide with my friend Sarah D.
• keep up with my group Bible study (this spring, we're doing Esther and then James)

Health/Fitness:

• exercise 2x a week
• lose 5 pounds (last year, I lost 7. Surely I can lose the last 5 this year!!!)

Household:

• Basic chores done weekly: trash emptied, bathrooms cleaned, floors swept/vacuumed
• Key surfaces kept clear (dresser, dining room table, desk, kitchen counters, entry way table). This is a biggie for me, folks.
• Maintain habits begun in 2009: kitchen completely cleaned every night (all dishes put away, etc.), laundry day, etc.

Office/Budget:

• Schedule all bills/pay everything in full by due date (no minimum payments here!)
• Pay off one of the two remaining loans we have (one is a student loan and one a car loan)
• Acquire better life insurance

Personal:

• Simplify: work on having only what we like/enjoy and getting rid of the rest!
• Figure out school plans for me (and get applications in/gain acceptance if appropriate)*
• Read 10 new books--all from my own bookshelves (we have lots I've never read)

Family:

• activity/event once a month (this can be raking leaves together; we're not talking about a big trip)
• get outside (all of us) every day that weather permits!
• all of us sitting through church together by year-end (boys are still in nursery)

Kids:

• Work on memory! (review catechism, learn some new ones, and memorize verses from Sunday School and Bible study)
• 1 art/creative activity a week
• get outside!!

Hobbies/Crafts:

• Photo books for 2009 and 2010
• Finish sewing projects I've already committed to.... (ahem...)
• Keep it simple.... (i.e. look in my own cookbooks for recipes before spending forever browsing online for the perfect recipe... plant only what I really want to eat/harvest in the garden--and not feel the need to fill up the entire gardening space.... )

Relevant Past Posts

It might be too late for these suggestions, but here are some ideas (and reminders) of good ideas for kid-gifts, teacher gifts, and just plain ol' Christmas/holiday reminders.

• Wrapping Gifts for Young Children
• Traveling Over Christmas with Children
• Interesting Nativity Facts
• Top 5 Consumable Gifts
• Enjoying the Holidays
• Top 5: Holiday Gifts for Teachers
• Top 5: Birthday Gifts for Children
• Music to the Ears! (list of good children's music--these make great gifts!)

Finally, consider some alternative gifts for children and their parents this year: give a Children's Catechism, a children's Bible, a family devotional guide, or other spiritually enriching gifts that bring the parents and children together. Gifts which enable parents to nurture their children spiritually, to bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord, are some of the best things you can give!

These Ornaments are for the Birds!

I don't know about you, but it seems to me that every little craft for kids this time of year involves food, tacky ornaments, more stickers, and so on.

If you want to do something a little bit different, something that is accessible even to fairly young children, try some birdseed ornaments. These will be hung outside, the birds will enjoy them, and you won't be stuck with more clutter inside your house. They'd make great gifts for gardeners, bird watchers, or teachers.

This "recipe" is from Birds and Blooms magazine (which is a very fun little magazine, by the way). The website gives two different methods of making these; I confess I haven't tried them yet, so I'm not sure which way works better. It seems to me that pressing the mixture in the cookie cutters might work better and/or be easier on little hands? I'll give you an update after we make these tomorrow.

Here are the ingredients/cooking method:

• 1/3 c. gelatin
• 1 1/2 c. water
• 8 c. birdseed

Combine gelatin and water in a pot over low heat. Stir until gelatin is melted and clear. Remove from heat and stir in birdseed, making sure all seeds are coated with gelatin mixture. Fill cookie cutters with seed mixture or pat mixture into jelly roll pan. Refrigerate for a couple of hours, until firm. Cut shapes, if needed, out of the big flat mixture or pop them out of the cookie cutters if you went that route. Let dry on a baking rack for 3 days.

Enjoy! The magazine link above has other ideas as well.

A Different Perspective

Christmas is FAST approaching! Many of us are focusing on celebrating Christ's birth, and teaching our kids about it. However, I also challenge you to remember something else. Two years ago, my husband and I lost a little baby boy at 16 weeks on Christmas Day. It was a very gut wrenching process. At the time I was faced with two perspectives. One was "come quickly Lord!". The other was as Paul puts it so well in Philippians, "for me to live is Christ, to die is gain." My work on earth was not finished. I had two boys at home who needed guidance still in their Christian life.

Many times we wait until it's almost too late to minister/evangelize with someone. This also hit Betsy recently with someone they are close too. Faced with an impending death, they needed to speed up the evangelistic process with their friends before it was too late.

SO-I challenge you to #1: Remember Christ was born so he could die-we should almost be celebrating the resurrection at this time of year too-instead of waiting for Easter. And #2: Think of those friends or loved ones who you could minister too as well. Make sure they know not only that Christ was born on Christmas (or the day we have set aside for it), but that the reason he came was to die to forgive sin, once and for all!

Supporting Your Husband: a Dose of Perspective

Perhaps you have a number of items on your "to do" list this time of year that revolve about creating the perfect Christmas for people, whether that be buying gifts, making gifts, sending out the perfect Christmas card photo, or decorating your house to the max. I know many women who, like myself, enjoy making things for people and are also on a budget. For us, Christmas "to do" lists seem larger than life: make Christmas stockings for the kids next week, make candy for Johnny's Sunday School teacher this weekend, buy the Christmas tree TONIGHT because it's on sale, decorate said Christmas tree TOMORROW because Christmas party is THIS WEEKEND, wrap secret Santa present for hubby's work TODAY, order photo cards THIS WEEK so they'll get in the mail on time, and on and on and on....

Where are our families in all this mess? Specifically, where is your husband? It's easy at any time of the year to start grumbling and complaining about being a stay at home mom, watching enviously as hubby drives off to work BY HIMSELF in that car with a glorious commute to work that doesn't involve any little voices whining, saying "Mommy," and pointing out every single last dump truck on the way. But think about it for a minute: yes, your husband may get more "alone time" than you. Yes, he can run in the store for something quick and not have to load/unload children. Yes, he gets to work out on his way home from work. Yes, he gets to have adult conversation any time he wants it.

BUT, we stay-at-home moms have some things that are just as good--and probably which our husbands envy. Instead of complaining this season about all that you have to do, think about the following:

• Is your to do list full of things YOU have decided and/or want to do? How many of them can you farm out to others or... just not do? What is really essential for your family's celebration of our Lord's birth? (If you need a reality check here, go read Little House on the Prairie).
• Your mental to do list is rarely created by outside deadlines. If you don't get the laundry done today, who's really going to care? In contrast, if your husband doesn't meet his work deadlines on time, there can be real issues. I can guarantee that you and your hard-working husband both have stress and his is probably worse--his is put on by outside forces whereas ours is often self-created.
• When you're "stuck at home" all day long, do you sit down and check your email? Read a blog? Call a friend? Work on a sewing project here and there? Plan your garden for next year? Work on a craft with your child? Bake some cookies for the fun of it? Go outside to play with your kids? All of those things are not only optional, but usually they are for the sake of enjoyment. How many times does your husband, while at work, get to talk on the phone to a friend? Take a quick walk for some fresh air? Have some freshly baked cookies? Spend quality time with a family member? Probably not very often.
• Are you still "working" when your husband gets home? If so, then I'd suggest that you cross off some items from that to do list without doing them. I try very hard not to keep working after my husband gets home from work. I make sure the kitchen is cleaned up (often doing as many dishes before we eat as possible) and the kids are in bed. That is it. Sometimes, I'll fold laundry if we're watching a TV show. If I work on a crafty project, my Bible study, or something like that in the evening, I try my hardest to make sure it's a night when he'll be home late or he has to work from home (he used to work from home more when he was a professor; thankfully he doesn't bring much work home anymore). I do not stay up late baking cookies, writing thank you notes, doing housework, etc. in lieu of spending time with my husband.

Ladies, don't let your Christmas wishes/hopes/to do lists take away from your time with your husband. Don't you think he's feeling the stress of working hard in order to pay for the perfect Christmas? Make sure you include him in things if he's interested. Save decorating the tree or making that gingerbread house with the kids until the weekend so he can take part. RELAX about all of your personal deadlines. If the Christmas cards are late, so what. Making Christmas meaningful and "fun" for our families includes making it that way for our husbands as well as making it that way for our kids.

Advent: The Best Gift Ever

As many of you know, today is the first day of the Advent season-the period of time leading up to the day we celebrate Christ's birth on December 25. Though many of you have done advent calendars in the past, this one is a little different. The ladies in my church got together and made an advent calendar that starts today. What is different is that the verses for each day start at the beginning of the Bible-showing how we can see the coming of the Messiah from the dawn of time. I can't write the whole booklet for you here, but I will give you the key verses for each day and the passages in the Bible.

Nov. 29: Genesis 1:31; Genesis 1:1-3:24
Nov. 30: Genesis 9:11; Genesis 6: 11-22, 7:17-8:12, 8:20-9:17
Dec. 1: Genesis 12:2; Genesis 12:1-7, 15:1-6
Dec. 2: Genesis 22:18; Genesis 22:1-19
Dec. 3: Genesis 28:14; Genesis 27-28
Dec. 4: Genesis 50:20; Genesis 37, 39:1-50:21
Dec. 5: Exodus 3:15; Exodus 2:1-4:20
Dec. 6: Exodus 12:13; Exodus 12:1-14:31
Dec. 7: Exodus 19:4-5; Exodus 19:1-20:20
Dec. 8: Joshua 1:9; Joshua 1:1-11 and 6:1-20
Dec. 9: Judges 7:9; Judges 2:6-23; 6:1-6; 6:11-8:28
Dec. 10: 1 Samuel 9:16; 1 Samuel 3:1-21, 7:1-8:22, 9:15-10:9
Dec. 11: 2 Samuel 7:8; 1 Samuel 16-17, 2 Samuel 5:1-5, 7:1-17
Dec. 12: 1 Kings 18:36; 1 Kings 17:1-18, 18: 17-46
Dec. 13: 2 Kings 19:19; 2 Kings 18:1-19:19, 19:32-37
Dec. 14: Isaiah 9:6; Isaiah 1:10-20, 6:1-13, 8:11-9:7
Dec. 15: Jeremiah 9:7; Jeremiah 1:410, 2:4-13, 7:1-15, 8:22-9:11
Dec. 16: Habakkuk 2:1a; Habakkuk 1-2:1, 3:16-18
Dec. 17: Nehemiah 1:5; Nehemiah 1:1-2:8, 6:15-16, 13:10-22
Dec. 18: Luke 1:76-77; Luke 1:57-80
Dec. 19: Luke 3:16; Luke 3:1-22
Dec. 20: Luke 1:33; Luke 1:26-38
Dec. 21: Luke 1:48-50; Luke 1:39-56
Dec. 22: Matthew 1:22-23; Matthew 1:19-25
Dec. 23: Matthew 2:6; Matthew 2:1-12
Dec. 24: Luke 2:10-11; Luke 2: 1-20
Dec. 25: John 1:12; John 1:1-18

Don't Skip Those Naps!

As we enter into our busiest season of the year, let me remind any parents of young children out there: don't skip the kids' naps! Sleep is one of the body's best defenses against illness. Sleep does a world of good for correcting/maintaining cheery dispositions. Well rested children can "flex" a bit better when spending all day at a distant relative's house. Well rested children eat better. Nothing can ruin a holiday faster than a whiny, cranky, sick kiddo! So, don't let your schedule get so busy that you start sacrificing those important naptimes. Use that time to get ahead on your gift wrapping, baking, or online shopping (or take a nap, yourself!).

Pandora Radio

Looking for some non-commercial-filled holiday music? Want a radio station that plays classic Christmas songs as well as pop Christmas songs? Try Pandora. It's an internet based radio station for which you create an account/profile. Then, you create "stations" based on songs you already know and like. It will then play a "radio station" based on that song--all similar sounding songs. My husband and I are big fans and have an Allison Kraus station, an "Open the Eyes of My Heart" station that's all Christian praise music (yes, for those of you who know my hubby, HE created that station!), a couple of jazz stations, a U2 based station, and so forth.

But now... I've created a terrific Christmas music station. I typed in "Hark, the Herald Angels Sing" and picked the version by the Cincinatti Pops. So far this morning, commercial-free, we've heard "The Dance of the Sugarplum Fairies," "Good Christian Men Rejoice," "Jesu, Joy of Man's Desiring," and so forth--all classic Christmas songs, some instrumental, some sung--but all performed in a traditional style. My children are getting into it and everything.

So, when you're ready to escape the endless retail commercials surrounding the holidays, try Pandora. (There are occasional commercials, but VERY few).

p.s. Now a handbell version of "Angels We Have Heard on High" is on--lovely!

p.s. Now, it's "Joy to the World" performed by the Prague Philharmonic.... does it get any better than this?

Thanksgiving: Proper Perspective

The Pilgrims and the Indians, corn, turkey, pumpkin.... that's pretty much the image most of us have of the first Thanksgiving. (Thanks, Charlie Brown!)

While that is true, it is also true that the first Thanksgiving was very much a thanks giving to God for bringing the Pilgrims through that year, allowing them fellowship with the Indians, and providing them with food for the coming winter. Each group came together sharing of their bounty (and sharing their traditional recipes!).

This Thanksgiving, remember those first European settlers mixing with the American natives and their desire to thank the Lord. Did they have their favorite dishes at that Thanksgiving? Probably not. Did they have all their favorite people around? Most definitely not (in fact, many had died in the year previous). But they did have much reason to give thanks to God.

This Thanksgiving, Carrie and I won't be with our parents--for the first time since we left home, neither of us will be at the big family celebration that my mother's family has every year. We'll both be eating some different foods than are usual, but we will still have a wonderful day! We'll still have much reason to give thanks and to enjoy the fellowship of those with whom we're eating (gorging might be a better term, eh?).

The Thanksgiving meal we have with my mother's side of the family ALWAYS includes the following: turkey and cornbread dressing (homemade and my grandmother's recipe), gravy (for the dressing, of course), cranberry relish, some sort of sweet potato dish (used to be spiked with bourbon), rolls, custard fruit salad, pecan pie and chocolate ice box cake. It wasn't until both of us married that we started including pumpkin pie because our husbands like it (I'd never tasted pumpkin pie until I got to college!).

This year, here's what my immediate family will be doing. We'll get together with good friends, onecouple of which is from Louisiana and the other from Pennsylvania. Did we all grow up with different food on our Thanksgiving table? You bet. But, here's our conglomerate menu: turkey, cranberry relish, stuffing (those Yankees :) ), hashbrown casserole, sweet potato souffle, green bean casserole, rolls, pumpkin cheesecake, pecan pie, apple cranberry pie. A nice marriage of different traditions--in fact, I'll be bringing the pies and one recipe is my mother's and the other is my mother in law's. Even our appetizers reflect our diversity: crab dip, Chex Mix, artichokes....

So, don't sweat it this year if things aren't happening exactly as they always have in the past. It's the fellowship around a bountiful table and taking time out to give thanks to the Lord that's important. Make the most of it--our country is unique in that we take an entire day off from work to give thanks. Pretty neat, I think.

Operation Christmas Child

First of all, it's not too late!!! If you're familiar with this ministry/organization/charity and would like to still send a shoebox, you have until MONDAY, NOVEMBER 23.

Operation Christmas Child is one of many charitable giving opportunities that crop up this time of year. It's a significant part of Samaritan's Purse Ministries, begun by Franklin Graham. Why am I mentioning this particular opportunity among the thousands that present themselves?

1. It's a very tangible way for your children to participate in giving to someone else.

2. It's a reliable way to give something tangible to needy children (no one's going to embezzle tubes of toothpaste or Dollar Tree earrings).

3. It's a Christian ministry; the gospel is presented along with every shoebox.

4. It's easy: pick an age group and a gender that you would like to give something to. Go shopping and/or make something. Pack a shoebox and drop it off. (OK, this isn't quite as easy as giving a check, but it is easier than some of the Angel Tree requests I've shopped for in the past!)

5. It's got a big bang for the buck. You can fill a shoebox fairly inexpensively ($10-$20 should do the trick), attach your $7 donation (helps cover shipping and such), and make a child's Christmas. In the grand scheme of things, this is a relatively small amount of money with a big yield.

How does it work? You and your children fill a shoe box or similar sized plastic container with age- and gender-appropriate items (there's a list of recommendations on the website), wrap the shoe box, and drop it off at a location in your area (a list of these also on the website). Many churches and schools sponsor this, so your child may already have been given a flyer. If you missed the school/church deadline, it's not too late to drop a box off at a donation spot in your city! Then, Samarian's Purse ships the boxes to children around the world, presenting the gospel after the children open their presents. There are all kinds of heart warming videos on the website. Now, you can also "track" your box. If you make your $7 donation online, you'll get an email once your box is delivered. I think that's pretty cool.

Our Duty as Women

I always find it interesting when my various Bible study involvements overlap in a certain theme. This is one from this week. Both in teaching our youth girls this week, and our women's Bible study I encountered part of our duty as Christian women, in a very worldly culture. These quotes came from George Grant: "...culture is the temporal manifestation of a people's faith....It is time for us to change the world with our tiny pushes of justice, mercy, and humble faith."

So what are we do to? I came across examples of how we are to be spiritual mothers. Susan Hunt has written many books on spiritual mothering, and how we are to be as true woman (2 main books have those actual titles in them-but there are others too.) Here are the 3 key points:

1. Verbal Affirmation
2. Approachable Spirit
3. Challenge to be Obedient

And the story for our youth girls was so great about a young mother who welcomed a teen into her home-despite the dirty dishes and other daily chores with kids. She helped nurture and mentor this young girl into her own leadership role as a mentor. How great is that.

And I also have to mention-in several studies I have done, we have looked at the relationship with Elizabeth and Mary, concentrating on when Mary went to see Elizabeth after hearing the news of being pregnant. Well, think about this. Mary didn't call before she came. She didn't write, she didn't ask when would be a good time. She just went. It never mentions Elizabeth freaking out about the laundry on the table, or the dishes from lunch, or the unswept doorway. Or apologizing for any of that. She just welcomed Mary in and let her stay for a long time, and did all 3 points mentioned above.

Mobile Hospitality: What to Bring?

This post is rather long; you might consider "bookmarking" it for future reference after quickly skimming it.

Since I've defined "mobile hospitality" as bringing food/hospitality to others, it's important to know what kinds of food you can bring! There are several concerns to address when picking a recipe/menu.

1. What are the allergies (or severe dislikes) of the recipient? Always determine this upfront. Today, many people are highly allergic to very normal ingredients: peanuts, wheat/gluten, eggs, soy, and so forth.

2. Are there any strong preferences? Sometimes this question is important, especially if young children are in the home. You might as well bring something they will eat!

3. What are their limitations? Is the primary chef completely incapacitated and it's up to children/elderly/inept adult to reheat the meal? Is the family moving and without dishes/cups/pots and pans? Do they have an erratic schedule because they're at the hospital at random hours of the day/night? Will they be entertaining others during this time? (especially likely at a death or during a move if people are helping packing)

4. What are your own limitations? Budget? Time? Inability to run out to the store quickly? Don't like to cook? Do like to cook? You can always team up with someone else to prepare a meal together--one person brings the main course and the other brings salad and bread or something to that effect.

5. Remember that nearly anything can be taken/offered if it meets the following criteria:

• can be reheated, if necessary, easily
• can be taken in dishes that don't need to be returned, if possible
• requires minimal "last minute" effort
• is something you yourself would enjoy eating/receiving
• could be stored a day or so or put in the freezer if the recipient has other food as well

6. Remember, too, that part of a meal is often just as welcome. Showing up with homemade muffins or bread will cheer anyone up! Bringing all the "fixin's" along with a pound of BBQ from a local restaurant, a big bag of fresh fruit, or some already-prepped snacks for kids could be your contribution.

7. It's the details that really show some extra thoughtfulness: include a kid-friendly dessert, remember an upcoming birthday or acknowledge an upcoming holiday (I included red and blue Jell-O jigglers in star shapes when I took someone food around July 4th--the kids loved it), remember the napkins and utensils for someone moving, include some fancy hot chocolate mix or tea/coffee, etc.

8. Finally, if you already have a specialty that everyone raves about, read no further! Do you make amazing, decorated cookies? Let the coordinator know you'll bring dessert and then decorate like crazy. Is there a dish everyone comments on when you bring it the church potluck? Stick with what works. You can have a "stock meal" that you always make whenever you bring food to someone; it likely won't be the same person very often, so there's no need to reinvent the wheel each time.

With those guidelines in mind, consider some of the following ideas. If you're part of a group that is taking food over the course of a few weeks, you might check to see what others are bringing. You don't want each to show up with a chicken casserole.

Main Courses

(all of the items below are easy to fill out with a simple bagged salad and loaf of bread or chips or cornbread)

Baked Pasta Dishes

• easy to cook, easy to freeze, easy to transport, can be very cost effective or bought ready-made and still be delicious!
• includes things like lasagna (Stouffer's is popular, delicious, and easily available--a good option if you don't/can't cook), manicotti, chicken spaghetti, baked rigatoni, etc.

Soups/Stews/Chili

• like baked pasta dishes, these are easy to make, easy to transport, often economical, and freeze easily; in addition, they are easily rounded out by a bagged salad and starch of some kind
• any kind of chili
• homestyle, hearty meat and veggie soups (with or without noodles, rice, or other starch)
• home-y soups like potato, chicken and dumplings, etc.

Comfort Food

• especially welcome during times of trial/stress; usually a crowd-pleaser
• includes things like Chicken Pot Pie, Shepherd's Pie, Meatloaf

Leftovers

• if you're taking food to a small family--perhaps a couple who's just had their first child--then make a bigger pot roast, extra mashed potatoes, and such and simply bring over the leftovers
• Grilled meats or a ham that taste good hot or cold, can be used in salads or sandwiches

Ready-made Favorites

• don't have time to cook? Pick up a main courses, fill out with other storebought items or fix the accompaniments yourself
• Particularly good for people moving: Deli tray or pizza
• Other good options: BBQ, fried or rotisserie chicken, spiral sliced ham

Non-Bagged-Salad Side Dishes

• if you have extra time and/or think the person might be getting tired of salad
• Speedy Rosemary Green Beans (bag everything together and write directions on it; stick it in their freezer) or any bag of frozen veggies with cooking directions and/or special seasonings attached
• Spinach Maria or Spinach Souffle
• Potato dishes like Twice-Baked Potatoes, simple baked or sweet potatoes, make ahead mashed potatoes
• Cold sides like Coleslaw, fruit salad, Jell-O salad, veggies and dip

Breakfast!

• Quiche (transports easily and can be eaten for any meal of the day)
• Muffins
• Homemade Bread (yeast bread or quick breads)
• Homemade Granola

Snacks

• few people think of this, but if a family has young children and they are tied up moving or tending a sick relative in the hospital or something like that, already-prepped snacks can be a welcome addition
• cheese (cut up) and crackers
• jello squares
• snack mix/trail mix
• granola bars

Desserts/Sweets (yum!)

• Brownies
• Cookies
• Snack Cakes (the kind that don't need icing)
• Homemade pudding

Special Circumstances

• People Moving won't have lots of dishes available, so take food that won't need reheating and/or can be eaten easily with disposable plates/utensils if necessary; in addition to food, they would appreciate drinks/cups and napkins
• Ethnic Groups: if your church ministers to an Asian group, for instance, you might be called upon to take food to someone from China. Perhaps a bag of stir-fry ready veggies (all chopped up), some cut up meat, and some cooked rice would be a good idea. They can throw together a quick meal from that point.
• New Moms: it's best to avoid spicy foods and hard-to-digest foods such as cabbage or beans that can cause distress in a nursing baby. Sometimes, nursing mothers don't have to avoid anything, but you never know those first couple of weeks. Keep it simple.
• Texture issues: very young children and sometimes the elderly have trouble chewing hard, crunchy items. Instead of sending salad or carrot sticks, you might offer a cooked vegetable or some options (cucumbers, for instance, are softer than carrots) or even a fruit dish like applesauce or jello salad.
• Erratic Schedule or Impaired Immune System: A person may need to minimize the number of visitors to the house if a very sick person is being cared for. If they are back and forth to the hospital at random hours, then it can be hard to coordinate with people bringing food. Sometimes, it's best to group together and each provide a meal for the recipient's freezer. One person can work with the recipient to meet up and drop off the food all at once.

Mobile Hospitality: How to Get Started

You've identified a good candidate for mobile hospitality. Now what?

First, make sure you really want to serve in this way--

it is an opportunity for service, but don't do it out of obligation. (Hopefully, you do feel motivated to serve in this way!)

Second, ask the person in question!

Call, email, text, ask in person.... it doesn't really matter. What you say is more important than the medium you choose. For instance, don't say, "Do you need anything? I'd love to help you out." The person will likely say, "Oh, thanks, but I think we're okay."

Instead, be very specific. Say something like this: "I know times are rough for you guys right now. I'd really love to bring you a meal to help you out. What day is good for you?" OR "I'm going to the store tomorrow and wondered if I can pick anything up for you. I can swing by your place on my way home. Do you need any milk? or cereal? Want me to pick up a rotisserie chicken?" OR "I know you're moving Friday, and I'm sure you're quite busy this week! Please let me bring something by tomorrow for you and your family to eat for dinner. What do your kids like to eat?"

You get the picture. A specific request/offer like those above shows the person in question that you really are serious and want to do this. Sometimes, you can assume that they will accept (for instance, when a mom has just had a baby!), and just announce you're coming by in a day or two.

If your church has people in place already who coordinate these types of ventures, seek that person out and volunteer. Our nursery coordinator takes care of new mothers, our women's ministry directors help with meals related to a death, and we have a woman who coordinates a freezer in the church kitchen, making sure it's stocked with various things someone could to take to a widow or shut-in on a visitation. The other occasions (morning sickness, moving at the end of the week, child in the hospital, and so forth) are just done by whoever sees the need. There are a few of us who regularly do this sort of thing, and we usually send an email around asking if anyone's gotten the ball rolling yet. If there is someone official who takes care of meals, you are better off signing up on their rotation or volunteering to be on their list. Otherwise, you might take more food than can be eaten by the family in question or "step on someone's toes" if this is their "official ministry." I can guarantee that those who normally coordinate meals love to have a "regular" they can count on when a need arises!

Once you've figured out a need and/or volunteered to be on a coordinator's list, what do you take to the family in question? What if you don't cook? What if you work all day and don't have time to fix a "home-cooked" meal? Or, what if your budget is tight and you can't afford to bring lasagna to a family of 8? We'll answer those questions in our next installment, so stay tuned! There's a solution for everyone.

Mobile Hospitality: Who Needs It?

We're called in Scripture to practice hospitality, to serve others, to love our neighbors as ourselves. One of the best ways to do this in our modern society is to bring that hospitality to others: to give hospitality wheels and make it mobile.

I've written before about hospitality on full tummies (keeping your freezer stocked and practicing hospitality on a budget), but I thought I'd write a bit more on this idea of mobile hospitality, partly because I've been given numerous opportunities recently in which to practice it!

What is mobile hospitality? I'm using the term to refer to meals and food we bring to someone in need. Everyone has to eat. Frequently, that's one of the easiest needs for someone outside the family to provide when the family (or person) in question is struggling in some way. In addition, it's one of the socially acceptable needs for us to help meet for someone else; if you offered someone money, he or she would most likely turn it down, especially if you're not related or a close friend. But if you call someone up and offer a meal, he or she often accepts. Both money and food might be lacking, but people will feel more comfortable accepting food than cold, hard cash. In our modern society, most people do not live in the same cities as their parents and other relatives. It's more and more up to the church to step in where relatives might have stepped in years ago.

So, who needs this mobile hospitality? The classic three occasions for bringing food to someone are the following: birth of a new baby, death in the family, or moving from location to location. Those are certainly times in which people appreciate a good, home-cooked meal. But what about other possibilities? If you start thinking and looking around, you might notice myriad other opportunities for mobile hospitality. Consider the following scenarios, all of which have occurred to my friends in the past year. I've been fortunate enough to be in a place where I could serve them.

• A mom is struggling with extreme morning sickness upon the discovery of an unexpected pregnancy. There are 5 other young children at home as well. Does she feel like cooking for, much less eating with, her family?
• A mom is spending all day at the hospital by the bedside of a very sick child. The husband is spending all night with the same child. The remaining children have been farmed out to friends in the area. When they return from the hospital, the cupboard and fridge are bare, and the mom still needs to provide care for her child.
• A woman's mother is dying of cancer, is in the care of hospice, and the woman wants to spend as much time as possible with her mother during these last precious days of life. She also has a family of her own. A meal brought by someone enables her to spend more time with her mother instead of cooking at home.
• A mom is fighting cancer and goes in for chemo treatments every other week. She is weak and sick those weeks, yet still has a 5-year-old and husband 9who works full-time) at home who need to eat.
• A woman has a knee replacement and her elderly parents live with her and her husband. She will be unable to move around without crutches for a number of weeks.
• My mother-in-law broke her arm and faced a lengthy recover. Her elderly parents are also living with them. The only person able to cook and take care of household needs using more than 1 arm is my father-in-law who is at work all day.

Do you think these women and their families appreciated the groups of people who got together to bring them meals over the course of days or weeks? You bet. Here's a good rule of thumb to use when ascertaining if a person or family could benefit from a meal delivered to their door:

If the primary cook and/or one of the primary caregivers is legitimately needed elsewhere or incapacitated in such a way that he or she cannot provide meals like normal for the family, then a meal is welcome. This is particularly true when there are dependents in the household who cannot fend for themselves: children, the elderly, the disabled.

Chronic illness, short-term serious illness, major transition (job loss, moving, etc.), lengthy power outages, births, deaths, a caregiver off visiting a sick relative, and so forth--all provide opportunities for the rest of us to serve!

So, how do we practice this mobile hospitality? Stay tuned for some ideas (including ideas for setting the wheels in motion as well as what to bring). Can't cook? We'll cover that, too.

I Think I'll Buy A New Cookbook...

Ha ha ha ha....

We Americans think like this: if we're bored, tired of something, want a "better" solution, want to replicate someone else's creation (especially one on TV or the internet), etc., we think we need to buy something!

Think again, my friends. Very often, if we were doing the work set before us, we wouldn't be bored. If we're tired of the same old, same old, I guarantee there are ways of changing it up without buying a new product. Perhaps we want a better solution to something; have we looked at our random, accumulated things for a substitution first? Have we tried the library or our friends for ideas? What if we want to replicate someone else's creation? First, we should ask if that is a worthy goal for someone in our position (making bagels from scratch or building your own compost bin might not fit into your current situation). Second, we should see how much free information and/or inexpensive options we can scrounge up. Let me use cookbooks as an example.

I was thinking a few weeks ago that I'd like to get a new cookbook--you know, some new recipes to try. In the old days, I might have actually bought a new cookbook. During the past few years, however, I've realized there are some quick (free) fixes to this urge to "try something new."

1. Try a recipe out of a cookbook I already own that is a "new" recipe to me (since I own such mega-cookbooks like The Joy of Cooking and the infinitely variable options in How to Cook Everything, it is impossible for me to EVER cook every recipe that I "own.").
2. What about wanting to cook healthier or wanting to cook more family friendly or wanting to cook something more ethnically-related? Simple: I reread my already-ownedcookbooks first. Many times, a reread will remind me of recipes I'd forgotten or I'll notice something new since I wasn't tuned into this same "need" the last time I read that particular cookbook. (Maybe the last time I skimmed my Fannie Farmer book, I was looking for good casserole recipes; now I might be looking for more vegetable-related options.)
3. I can check out a cookbook from a library or borrow one from a friend. This is a terrific way to test-drive a cookbook you're really considering buying; it's also a great way to get your Chinese-food-from-scratch-fix taken care of.
4. There are other free resources: I can ask my friends for a good whole wheat bread recipe if I'm discontented with mine. I can search the internet for recipes that use my abundance of green cayenne peppers.

Finally, is it really necessary to reinvent the wheel? So often, we get bored/tired of something, and we want to do something new, discover a new strategy, etc. But, we're called to press on, to persevere in this life, to work diligently in what the Lord has called us to do. It's okay to be bored or tired of something sometimes. We don't have to prepare gourmet meals for our families every night for them to be eating healthily (and for them to be enjoying it). We don't have to have the latest, greatest technological equipment for us to enjoy a movie. We don't have to have the best sports equipment to enjoy throwing a ball around with the kids. We can play the same old card game--maybe add a new rule for kicks--and still have fun. We can go to the same local park for a thousand fun-filled evenings for the same price as one ice cream cone from Marble Slab.

Forget the consumeristic-attitude that our culture has indoctrinated us with and enjoy what you have! Paul reminds us that godliness with contentment is great gain. (Ironic that "gain" is the word used--we want to "gain" more things when we're discontent, but our gain will ultimately be greater when we choose contentment over and above mere acquisition.)

posted on full tummies as well.

Making the Most of Your Children's Clothes

Young children are hard on clothes, grow out of clothes at seemingly random times, and could care less whether anything matches or is seasonally appropriate. I wish I had $1 for every time my daughter has wanted to wear a favorite t-shirt when it was 30 degrees outside, or has wanted to wear some fleece footie pajamas when it's 90 degrees outside. She shows up regularly at breakfast in striped skirts with patterned tops and so forth. My boys...well, we're doing good to keep them clean-ish from breakfast to lunch, much less stay in the same outfit, unscathed, for an entire day.

Here are some tips to make the most of your children's clothes, particularly if they are still at home with you and can dress casually.

1. Invest in quality basics. A few pairs of pants, some good heavyweight t-shirts, a nice button down or two, good shoes, etc. are all worth investing a bit of money in. If you think something will get worn daily, make sure it will hold up. That being said, you can still find many of these items on sale at the end of the season.
2. Buy basics in solid and basic colors. If your daughter loves pink, buy a solid pink skirt, a solid pair of pink shorts, and maybe a pink jumper. Then, you can pick up some frilly, flowery, princess-y shirts and tops here and there at a consignment sale and they will go with a number of items already in her wardrobe. But sweatpants and sweatshirts for winter wear in a variety of basic colors. Then, if your son shows up in his favorite gray shirt with his navy or red or black sweatpants--it will all work!
3. Buy one or two really fun items, but buy them on consignment. No one wants to wear boring clothes all the time, but children are notorious for being really into Bob the Builder one month and moving on to Curious George the next.
4. Use t-shirts all year: layer smaller ones under long-sleeve t-shirts, sweatshirts, or sweaters, and larger ones over long-sleeved t-shirts. Layers keep kids warmer, and they'll be able to wear that fun t-shirt they got at the beach all winter long.
5. Get creative: my children often put on clean clothes before nap-time in the winter if they've been playing outside all morning. The odds of it being light enough outside after their naps is slim, so they usually don't go outside again. Those clean clothes that were worn from naptime-bedtime then become the go-outside-and-get-dirty-clothes the next morning. Similarly, they often sleep in clean t-shirts in the summer. In the morning, they're ready for the day and we haven't dirtied up pajamas.