What Else Can Go Wrong?

I shouldn't even ask that question since we still have 1 1/2 hours until departure (for yet another trip). Why do things always go wrong when it's actually important that they not? In other words, why is it the day we're about to leave on a trip that the following things happen? (Mind you, it's not even 10:00 a.m.)

• 1 twin dumps dogs' water bowl out...all over kitchen floor, himself (of course, he's already in his travel clothes), and the other twin (also in travel clothes)
• daughter (who's potty trained) poops in her pants (her travel clothes)
• daughter spills yogurt all over her shirt because she disobeyed Mommy and didn't put her bib on first (or wait for it to be put on)
• all three kids get into the plastic wrap drawer: all ziploc bags (approximately 150) were pulled out of their boxes, saran wrap pulled off roll, foil in process of being pulled off roll....
• 1 twin rips two pages out of daughter's favorite Curious George book

I still have booster seats to clean, pac-n-plays to fold down, car to pack, lunch to get, sippy cups to wash and refill..... (sigh)

Just had to sit down and regroup for a minute--thought someone out there might be laughing to herself and knowing that these things happen to other people!

Postscript: We eventually made it out the door in one piece, but Chick-Fil-A forgot the fries I ordered through the drive thru shortly thereafter. Once we made it to our destination, things went pretty smoothly and my daughter was the cutest flower girl ever!

Road Trip!

Carrie and I (bravely) took our five children (need I remind you that they are ages 1, 1, 2, 2, and 5?) in ONE CAR to visit our parents this week. Everyone survived and had a great time (zoo, pool time, parks, reading stories, horsing around, etc.). Everyone is also pooped!

But, we learned something rather interesting to pass on: go to Cracker Barrel for your trip meals if you have young kids!!! We went to Wendy's on the way. It took us exactly 1 hour from getting out of the car to getting back in. The kids ate okay--but the food they did consume included chicken nuggets of questionable origin, milkshakes, mandarin oranges....

On the way back, we hit Cracker Barrel. We spent almost exactly the same amount--pennies different including the tip! And, we ate much more food--we all got breakfast. The kids ate more food than they'd consumed at Wendy's, it was brought to us (and the table cleaned up for us), and it was real food: eggs, biscuits, milk, etc. It took us about 20 minutes longer than our Wendy's stop, but it was well worth it. In addition, unless it's a super peak travel day, most Cracker Barrels I've been in have clean restrooms, and all have a place to change a diaper.

Bonus: we got each kid (that was old enough) a piece of candy for the road. Mmmm.... sugar.

We highly recommend Cracker Barrel for your next road trip!

The Great Gardening Game: the Harvest Continues

From my meager, bare ground beginnings, I'm now reaping a nice little harvest of tomatoes, cucumbers, hot peppers, green beans, and the beginnings of bell/sweet peppers! It's been lots of fun and... family members and close friends may want to sit down for this... I'm learning to like and enjoy fresh tomatoes!!!!!!!

My little garden has necessitated minimal work on my part these past few weeks. I'm only harvesting and pouring over cookbooks to see what new cucumber salad I can drum up or what new tomato sauce we can try. Our current (and very easy) favorite is a simple tomato basil sauce for sauteed chicken, compliments of Joy of Cooking. When I get a chance I'll post that at full tummies. Our cucumber salads and at least one tomato sauce recipe will be posted this week, so check it out!

You might consider putting in a garden next summer if you didn't this year. It's been quite rewarding! It's also been a good reminder that the Lord does indeed provide our food--when I just buy it at the supermarket, that's easy to forget. When I'm hoping for rain and trying to imagine what life would be like were I actually dependent on the garden for my food, then I remember that the Lord is indeed in control of our food and the curse was a real curse! (to work by the sweat of our brow)

The Struggle of Becoming Mom-Part 3

A long time ago, I started my series on the Struggle of Becoming Mom. My idea on part 3 was to talk about the loss of a child. Those that struggle with it. However, it is not always easiest to put into words what you do feel and what happens. And situations can be so different, each of us experience things differently. My hope for each of you is that if you do lose a child (miscarriage or other) that you too would experience God's "peace that surpasses ALL understanding." And would be surrounded by a body of Christ to meet your needs. My Bible study right now is going through a book and there was a story in it of a lady who had lost a baby. Another mother had written her a note, and it was so powerful to me that I thought I would let it speak for me. I don't know who wrote it.

This is the part of the letter:

"At the loss of a child find comfort in the sovereignty of God. There is no lost potential, no purpose unaccomplished, there is only the glorious plan of God perfectly fulfilled in a precious little life. With prayers that God will comfort your sorrow as we await the day when all things will be clearly understood."

New Teabag 1

Scripture for Student (insert their name if applies.)

Psalm 119:73-74
Your hands made ________ and formed him/her; give ________ understanding to learn your commands. May those who fear you rejoice when they see _________ for he/she has put his/her hope in your word. May your unfailing love be ________'s comfort, according to your promise to your servant.


Scripture for Mom

Psalm 145:2-7
Every day I will praise you and extol your name for ever and ever. Great is the Lord and most worthy of praise; his greatness no one can fathom. One generation will commend your works to another; they will tell of your mighty acts. They will speak of the glorious splendor of your majesty and I will mediatate on your wonderful works. They will tell of the power of your awesome works and I will proclaim your great deeds. I will celebrate your abundant goodness and joyfully sing of your righteousness.

Quicky Devotions

I am always learning something new teaching my Sunday school class. Most of you know you can read through a Proverb a day and you would finish in a month. (And they aren't that long!)

You can also do the same with Psalms. You can read one a day and finish in 3-5 months (many of the Psalms are really short). It is a quick read and many hymns are based off the Psalms.

If you want to make them longer, you can write them down in a journal and comment on them, how they pertain to your life, any relevant verses, etc.

New Kind of Teabag

Yeah, I know I have been absent yet again. I have been gearing up and drowning myself in starting homeschooling. Our local group met for a mom's night and one of the mom's there shared something with us. Several years ago, she was stuck in her prayer life and started taking verses from the Bible and using them to pray for herself and children. She would personalize them with their names. This is so great for anyone. It doesn't matter where your child goes to school, you can still have a prayer for them for the year. You know where they are, what they are struggling with and where they need to be. You can also have a prayer for yourself. Something you want to remember about God, his love for us, or how he cares for us.

So I am going to list the verses, one for student and mom each time. Not all will apply for you or your children. Some will. And if none do, find your own! Might be good to dust off your Bible for some extra study right!!

I Used to Say...

I thought it might be fun (and humbling) to start a running list of things I used to say I would never do, my kids would never do, or other edicts I issued along similar lines. I'll just republish this list occasionally with new ones added. I should point out that these charming assessments of the way my life would look once I had a husband and children were usually formed and voiced with my similarly single friends during and after college as we watched our newly married friends become parents themselves. Somehow, pre-marriage and pre-kids, we have all the wisdom of the ages, right? When reality hits, it's often hard to know what was a legitimate (i.e. Biblical) goal and what was just nuts!

1. My kid will never throw a tantrum at someone else's house.
2. My kid will eat her/his vegetables without complaining.
3. My kid will go to bed (or to nap) without issue because that's just the way it will be. We'll raise him/her to be like that.
4. My kids will never eat in the car.
5. My kids won't eat hot dogs frequently--what poor nutrition (I should point out here that I stock up on hot dogs when they're on sale...).
6. My kids will all love to read (thankfully, one does so far and the other two might come around).
7. I will never do natural child birth (before I decided to do natural child birth with my first).
8. I will never have a medicated delivery (after natural childbirth with baby number one and before I got pregnant with babies number 2/3 and had a vaginal delivery followed by an emergency C-section).
9. I will never have a blog.
10. My kids will never watch TV, certainly not until they're at least 2.
11. My kids will be toilet trained easily.
12. My kids will obey me in the park and come when I call.
13. I'll never threaten and not follow through.
14. I'll never bribe my kid to eat dinner by offering dessert as a reward.
15. We'll never have toys strewn about the house--how hard can it be to pick everything up before someone comes over?
16. I'll lovingly guide and nurture my children at all times; no yelling in this house (ha ha ha ha).
17. I won't lower my standards for babies after child #1 (well, let me tell you--the floors didn't get mopped daily when the twins started crawling; the twins haven't been read to every night of their little lives; the twins haven't had any professional photos taken; etc.)
18. I'll only breast feed my babies. (never anticipated twins; tried it and had to give it up)
19. I'll make everything from scratch.
20. I'll regain my pre-pregnancy shape easily because I'll exercise (when? What was I thinking? what's exercise?)

There are lots more! Feel free to comment with some of your own "I used to say..."

Savoring a Cup of Tea: Fruit of the Spirit (Gentleness)

For the other fruit of the Spirit posts, check the series index in the margin.

When I think of gentleness, I think of women tenderly nursing sick children (or their husbands), older children gently leading younger children, young adults patiently listening to the elderly tell their stories...in short, I think of areas or tasks that involve a great deal of patience and kindness mixed together. I think gentleness includes these two traits, but it must be more or it wouldn't have its own separate place in the list, right?

I think gentleness ultimately reflects quiet spirit. When I am truly seeking the Lord, spending time before him in prayer and reading Scripture, being still and knowing he is the Lord, then I begin to gain a small understanding of gentleness. As a parent, I have unlimited opportunities to demonstrate gentleness to my children--opportunities at which I fail usually. It seems to me that gentleness comes when we are quiet before the Lord and take that quietness and serenity into every area of our lives. When my oldest toddler spills her milk on the floor while she is practicing drinking out of a "big girl" glass, I can react gently when I correct her and clean up the spill (instead of overreacting and fuming at her and the general situation). When we are running late (usually my fault in the first place), I can gently nudge my three charges to the door rather than ranting and raving. Why do I want to rant and rave (besides my lack of self control)? I think it is because I haven't been quiet before the Lord; I'm letting the circumstances of my day "get to me" and fretting, fuming, stressing about it all. Instead, if I'd left my burdens with the Lord, ceased striving and rested in the knowledge that he is the Lord, then I probably wouldn't get bent out of shape as much. I'd be more equipped to be gentle in my interactions with those around me.

Gentleness also seems to come into play when we must correct someone or share some hard truth with someone we love. This occurs frequently when we are mothering young children; less frequently, we must correct an adult whom we love--perhaps a husband or family member. Rather than "blowing up" or reacting in the heat of the moment, we should pray about the issue and seek the Lord's guidance. Then, we should gently seek to restore that soul to Lord and/or to fellowship. We should let gentleness pervade our attempts at all reconciliation, no matter who the offended party is.

As I've reflected on parenting this year in particular, I've come again and again to the conclusion that if our goals are truly to grow more Christlike, to know him better each and every day, and to see those whom we love also come to know Christ better, then our actions will no doubt reflect the fruit of the Spirit more and more. This may sound obvious, but I think the more subtle fruit of the Spirit, like gentleness, will become more and more noticeable. The fruit of the Spirit often involve dying to self and looking to another's interest and to the glory of God. Keeping this perspective helps us be gentle when we might otherwise be frustrated, angry, or simply self-centered.

I think I have a long way to go in understanding and demonstrating gentleness. It's something I think about often--especially in connection with self control! When I pack my day too full of events, write a to do list impossibly long, create a list of unreachable expectations, start focusing on what others think of me (perhaps because of the way my children are acting), then gentleness goes out the window. In short, whenever I am trying to control my own life instead of seeking the glory of the Lord and the edification of my family, then it's nearly impossible for me to maintain a gentle and quiet spirit. As I pray for this fruit of the Spirit, I'm realizing that I can set myself up for failure by not recognizing the sacrifices I must make in certain areas of my life. So instead of merely praying for gentleness, I also need to pray for wisdom and the ability to set aside activities and interests which are cluttering up my life.

You Can Buy Coupons!

I had a whole post devoted to saving money on groceries without using coupons (haven't posted it yet). I figured that I couldn't be bothered with buying the Sunday paper, flipping through for the one or two coupons I might actually use, and then keeping up with those one or two coupons.... We just don't use many products that we need coupons for, and I can often beat the deal with the in store specials on generic products.

Or so I thought. Enter the new coupon clipping system: you can buy the coupons you want over the internet! Someone else is clipping all those coupons, organizing them, and selling them for about a dime apiece. When the coupon you want is for $1 off a certain product, you're still coming out ahead after you've forked over the dime. Both of these sites I'm going to link below also charge roughly a dollar or so extra for the total order by the time the shipping and handling is factored in. Not a problem if you're ordering a lot of coupons.

I ordered coupons for products I actually use--brands I'm committed to and such. Now, I'll wait for them to go on sale at the local stores. If they haven't by the time the expiration date is nearing, I'll just use them on the regular priced product. Every coupon I ordered was either $1 off or more, once doubling was factored in (Kroger doubles up to $0.50). Pretty neat, huh? I even ordered 12 coupons for my favorite organic peanut butter which I never, ever buy because it's too expensive. Just so happens that the local co-op has it on sale this month plus my new $1 off coupons! Brings it down to the price I normally pay for the inferior store brand!!! Hooray!

Here are the sites in case you're interested in computer-style coupon clipping:

The Coupon Clippers
The Coupon Master

I thought The Coupon Master was a bit pricier, but they have different stuff. So, check them both out! You can probably search your local grocery store flyer online as early as Saturday, then order corresponding coupons and have them by the end of the week.

Transition to Toddler-dom

We've arrived!!!! I no longer can say my "babies" because I now technically have three toddlers!!!! The dynamic duo has begun walking in earnest; their sister will graduate to "preschool" category soon since she turns three in October. But, for now, I have three toddlers with all that connotes. This is why I do nothing other than referee, rescue my house from the toddlers, and rescue the toddlers from the house (today's favorite scenario: twin B trying to play with a plug that was plugged into an outlet while big toddler sister tries to push him over and twin A is toddling over rapidly to see what all the fun is about....). It's a wonderful life (and never, ever boring).

What's for Dinner?

Published simultaneously at full tummies

School days are just around the corner! Many moms work these days, but even if you don't, chances are good that you are just as swamped with homework help, running errands, and taking care of your family; it seems that almost everyone needs help with healthy, affordable meal planning.

If you don't want to utilize the drive-thru, the processed grocery store food, or take out, what are your options for quick meals? You can cook for you freezer like I've been discussing at full tummies. Or, you can opt for a service that tells you what to cook and gives you your shopping list. These two websites are worth checking out if you're interested in a prepared menu and shopping list:

Saving Dinner (See my earlier review)
E-Mealz (Not tried yet, but intrigued by its link to grocery store deals!)

However you choose to go about it, feeding your family healthy food is important, but not the only thing in life. Try to find a plan that enables you to enjoy dinner time with your family, not spend all day in the kitchen, and works for your budget. Sometimes, shortcuts are worth paying for--especially if you are in a major life transition (new baby/babies, new job, recent move, etc.).

The Emergency Bag and the ER

My friend Lisa came up with this idea initially, but I have stolen it and used it as well! For 1 year old birthday gifts, she creates an emergency bag for the mom: a large tote bag into which is unceremoniously dumped an assortment of odds and ends the mother might need for a toddler emergency (don't get too organized with this because the bag won't stay that way). The idea is to leave this bag in the car. When you are stranded in traffic and need an extra snack...emergency bag. When Jr. has a "blowout" in the car on the way to the beach...emergency bag. When you suddenly decide to eat out and don't have a bib...emergency bag. When you decide to stop at the park without advance warning and it's 100 degrees outside...emergency bag. You get the picture.

A sampling of items to include:

Extra wipes
Extra diapers
Extra onesie or t-shirt
Extra plastic bag or two
Old handtowel or something similar
Travel size sunscreen
Travel size bandaids
Travel size neosporin
Travel size hand sanitizer
Snacks (packs of crackers, pretzels, etc.)
Small juice boxes
Bibs
Bottle of water (to use in clean up)
Index cards and pen (in case you have to call the doctor and need to write something down)

The tot's mom should replace everything they use as soon as she gets home. We've come to depend on ours and use it all the time--even when it's not an "emergency."

That being said, I had to help my friend (visiting from out of town) take her 5-year-old to the ER on Friday night. I grabbed the equivalent of an emergency bag for us: caffeinated drinks and a big bag of animal crackers. Since we left at 1:20 a.m., we certainly needed the caffeine and the little girl appreciated the animal crackers while we sat and waited in the ER (she clearly wasn't in life or death straits since we were thinking of vittles on our way out the door). It's worth taking a minute or two to think of these things if you can!

Happy Emergency Bag Packing!

Meals for a Month--Cooking for your Freezer

Recently, my 2-year-old daughter spent the weekend with her grandparents (my in-laws). I seized my opportunity and made a whopping 40+ meals for my freezer. I learned a lot and am already reaping the benefits of this labor of love, so I'm writing a small series on full tummies to share my experience.

My small family (2 adults, 1 2-year-old, 2 1-year-olds) can polish off half a pan of lasagna per meal. However, since we certainly can't polish off an entire pan of lasagna, I merely split the lasagnas I was making up into two smaller square pans. I did this with meals like chili and bigger casseroles. I really only needed 4 servings per meal. That's partly how I was able to make so many meals--it wasn't 40 separate "family-size" entrees.

With school fast approaching, it seems to me that this cooking approach might really benefit any who are attached to the academic calendar (for me, my husband was going back to work after the summer off--I knew my "dinner-time" referee was not going to be around; I needed to simplify the dinner routine so I would be available to referee). If your kids are headed back to school and its accompanying whirlwind of activities, if you are heading back as a teacher, if you plan to homeschool--you might benefit tremendously from a Saturday of cooking. Check out the series at full tummies these next couple of weeks if you're interested. You'll also need to round up some family-favorite recipes that freeze well, whether gathered from your existing cookbooks, or checking out a cookbook designed especially for this sort of cooking.

Happy Cooking!

The Great Gardening Game

A while back I wrote of my attempts to start a garden this year. I just thought I'd post a quick update for anyone who read that earlier post and is interested: we are about to harvest green beans (that my 2-year-old planted) and have been bringing in cucumbers and 1-2 tomatoes at a time, frequently. We're about to have a nice crop of tomatoes--there are tons of green ones. We've also harvested quite a few jalapenos... looks like I'll have to whip up some jalapeno pepper jelly! No bell peppers yet, so we'll see.

Top Ten Children's Consignment Sale Tips

These are becoming big business--or, at the very least, much more common than they used to be. Carrie and I both have gotten the majority of our children's clothes at these sales for so much less than retail! Some sales run every fall and spring with appropriate seasonal clothes; others are a once-a-year-event with all seasons of clothes. These are great places to pick up barely worn, nice name brand clothes; they're also great places to stock up on pajamas and play clothes. A few tips before you venture out to the mass confusion of racks and racks of individually priced clothes and toys:

1. Write down what you already have (especially if you need to find a matching shirt or something)
2. Write down/make a note of what you really want to find (perhaps a winter coat or a couple of church outfits)
3. Take note of current sizes and coming seasons/sizes; you can shop ahead at these sales
4. Pick your shopping time carefully (the first day and the last day--which is usually 1/2 off--are the busiest; leave your children home; plan on a couple of hours)
5. Think through pricing before you get to the sale (for instance, can you get brand new sweat pants at Wal-Mart for $3? Then, only buy sweat pants less than $3 at the sale. What is your limit on any given item? What will you be willing to spend for a dream outfit?)
6. If you're looking for big items (furniture, strollers, big high-demand toys), you'll probably want to go early, if possible.
   
7. Make sure you scan the toys for future presents for your little darlings. They won't know it's used (I got an easel for $6 that has a dry erase board on one side and a chalkboard on the other--it's darling!).
   
8. Take a laundry basket or large tote to stash items in as you shop.
9. Look over EVERYTHING you pull off the racks (check for stains, small tears, etc.).
10. Take someone with you: it's more fun and it often helps to have a second opinion.

Enjoy your shopping!

Life Lessons from Frog and Toad: "The List"

Frog and Toad Together is my favorite of the Frog and Toad collections by Arnold Lobel. These "I Can Read Books" contain more profound insight into human nature than most grown-up literature. Take the first story in this collection: "The List." Toad makes a to-do list and loses it. That's the short version. The details, though, cut to the quick....

Toad wakes up and makes a to-do list. He decides to write "wake-up" as his first item. Then, he already has something to cross off! I've done this, I confess. I so want to cross those items off that list so that at the end of the day it will look like I've accomplished something. So, I've actually written down things that needed to get done, but which I've already done that day! (sigh) Anyone else out there in this camp?

In addition to the glorious satisfaction of crossing items off the list, Toad reveals another human foible (that I also share): he tells Frog, "'My list tells me that we will go for a walk.'" (emphasis mine). How many times do we let our to-do lists dictate our day? If the weather is beautiful outside, but I've planned a big day of housecleaning, I often still do the housecleaning.

After Toad accomplishes some of the items on his list (get dressed, eat breakfast, go see Frog, go for a walk with Frog, ...), he loses the list. (gasp!) Well, this little event paralyzes Toad. When Frog suggests that they chase after the list, Toad's response is telling: "'running after my list is not one of the things that I wrote on my list of things to do!'" I'm like that, too. I let myself get paralyzed by my list: if it's not on the list, it's not as important as the items that are on the list. This is something I'm trying desperately to overcome. If one of my precious children, for instance, is in the middle of discovering something huge (putting food in his mouth by himself for the first time, for instance, or taking his first, staggering, Frankenstein-looking steps), then I need to pull up a chair and enjoy the show! Who cares if watching junior cram a saltine in his mouth is not on my list of things to do?! What if our power goes out (like it did a few months ago), and I really can't do anything on the list? Then, instead of sitting there fretting like Toad did, I need to seize the day. (Which, thankfully, is what we did).

If you're in this boat, too--paralyzed by your to-do list that will never, ever get accomplished again because you now have a husband and/or children--then take a step back. Some things that have helped me immensely in this area are the following:

1. write only 3 things down: if you only get these three things done, then you're done for the day. Everything else is extra. This is very helpful for me. I put down the truly most important tasks (this might include dinner prep, a load of laundry, and scheduling the twins' one-year checkup...that's it!).

2. plan only one "Big Event" of the day: this might be your shower if you have a newborn in the house, and you're sleeping every other waking minute. Perhaps it's the kids' doctor's appointment, and you know you really won't have time to do anything else during the day. Or, it might be calling a friend you really need to talk to, knowing it will be a long conversation.

3. write down the things you know will be doing, but that are still meaningful: when I was a mother of only one newborn, I wrote down how many times I'd need to nurse her that day, along with taking a shower and taking a walk on my to-do list. At the end of the day, I realized that I might not have done anything around the house, but I was clean, my daughter had been fed 8 times that day, and we had both gotten fresh air. Pretty important in those early days for both of us.

Thankfully, the Lord doesn't have a to-do list when dealing with us, at least not in the way we understand to-do lists. In fact, in addition to all the Scripture encouraging us to be zealous for the faith, do good deeds, love other people, etc. etc., there are some priceless messages to be still, to know that He is God, to wait for the Lord. A personal favorite is the New American Standard Version of Psalm 46:10: Cease striving, and know that I am God.

This is also posted at LiterariTEA.

Savoring a Cup of Tea: Faith Pointes (Chapter 6: Developing the Attitude of Gratitude)

Another great chapter in Barbara Barker's Faith Pointes. As I mentioned in my earlier post, Carrie and I are just now going through this book with the aim of actually discussing it. This will be a GREAT chapter to discuss.

As usual, Barbara boils it down for us: We can choose to be thankful, to cultivate an attitude of gratitude. Frequently, the feelings of thankfulness follow. How can we cultivate this attitude? She offers a few steps (you really should read the whole thing; this is only a brief summary!). 1) Be thankful for our relationship with Christ and his provision for us ("The truth is when you have Christ, you need nothing else.") 2) Learn to contemplate the attributes of God (such as holiness, wisdom, justice, love, etc.). 3) Realize that God does not owe you anything but judgment. 4) Keep in mind the whole reason for your existence ("God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works"--Eph. 2:10). 5) Realize that being thankful is an act of the will. 6) Verbalize your thankfulness to others.

In the discussion questions, there's an interesting corollary that develops between our gratitude/ingratitude on the one hand and our contentment/discontent on the other. I'm not sure which comes first, but when we are more content, we are more thankful--or when we are more thankful (choosing an attitude of gratitude), we are more content.

It's also sobering to look at how much the Lord dislikes complaining and grumbling--how many times in Scripture we are commanded NOT to complain, or people (like the Israelites) are disciplined for complaining. Conversely, we are encouraged and commanded over and over again to praise and thank the Lord. What an example we set for our children in this!!! And, how much more pleasant a home we create by simply not complaining about everything (to, or in front of, our husbands especially!). This is something I really need to work on.

And now, I'm off to get up my three children and will choose to be thankful that we have an abundance of food to eat instead of complaining about the work food prep takes me! As a side note, I should also mention how very, very, very thankful I am for my husband and children. In the last few weeks, I've been reminded of this through some rather poignant conversations with friends of mine: two just had miscarriages and are still grieving the loss of those precious ones; another girl was weeping from fatigue--she is a single mom who is working hard during the week and faithfully coming to church on Sunday...and her toddler is entering the testing-2's in full force. How grateful I am that the Lord has seen fit to bless me with children and with a wonderful husband who loves both me and our children (and loves the Lord!). Carrie just posted a great message about this, too.

Savoring a Cup of Tea: Womanly Advice

Betsy and I have from time to time complained about our husbands, and the lack there-of when we need help :-). What wife doesn't, right?! Well, I get emails from a forum through a homeschool curriculum place. I thought what this lady had to say was excellent (and I don't normally read these things.) So I am pasting it here. As a disclaimer...Betsy and I haven't complained this bad, and we weren't about to leave our husbands. This was written in response to a woman who was considering leaving or divorce. Enjoy.

"I know what it is like to be married to a workaholic husband. My husband used to think of nothing else but work, and any free time was spent serving others at church and in the community, or playing golf, etc. Right after we found out I was pregnant with my middle child, he took a six month assignment out of the country in order to advance his career. I was late being taken to the hospital to be induced with two of my pregnancies because he was working. I remember begging him one morning to help me--he left and went to the gym. I could go on and on. Not because my husband is a bad husband--he's actually a good one--but just to say I know where you are coming from. It is easy to start feeling unloved when a husband places priority on work over family.

It wasn't until I started hanging out online that I realized some husbands would not work and provide for their families. Knowing that my husband went out and worked and actually brought his money home while others either sat at home or gambled their money away sure gave me some perspective. Knowing that my husband actually was at a home owners meeting or playing golf instead of having an affair really gave me some perspective.

I also got some wise advice from women who are happily married who encouraged me to stop thinking of myself and start thinking of my husband. I stopped nagging. I started smiling. I tried to make things easy on him when he came home instead of wanting him to help me. I started overlooking his faults and being thankful for his strengths. I began to realize that many of the things I was upset about were due to his way of dealing with the pressure and stress he was feeling. My husband once confessed to me that he felt like he was a failure and like he was in a "pit of self loathing." And here I was piling it on about his faults. That sure didn't help much. Your husband may be feeling the same--for many men, work and TV and computer are an escape.

It has been a long journey, but my marriage and home are totally different now. My husband has voluntarily stopped working insane hours. He has cut all of his outside commitments. He even cut out all of his church activities, telling them he needed to invest in his family. When people ask him to go play golf or something, he makes up an excuse. The only reason that change came about is because I started making an effort to make home a place he wanted to be.

I used to complain that my husband never helped me, but now he voluntarily does a lot around the house. Sometimes he'll go get groceries on his way home from work or at night after I've gone to bed. He'll fold a load of laundry. He'll clean the kitchen. This change didn't come about because of me making any demands on him. It started with a change in me.

I would encourage you to pray for your husband. Start seeing good in him. Start thinking of ways you can be a help to him. Put the clothes away for him. Help him interact healthily with the kids. Help the kids learn to respect and serve him. Thank him for working so hard for you. Look for things to thank him for. If your husband wants to eat dinner in front of the TV, get your dinner and go sit with him. Recognize that he is also feeling stress and pressure. Forgive him for the many mistakes he has made.

It sounds like you've had an extremely difficult time, but the Lord has and can continue to sustain you. It sounds like your husband has made some bad financial decisions. It sounds like your husband is not perfect. None of our husbands are perfect. You aren't perfect either. You cannot force your husband to change. Your attitude toward your husband is the only thing you can change.

It sounds like you married a good man and he is struggling right now. You married him for better or worse. It doesn't sound to me like you have grounds to leave him, and I don't think you'll find things any easier as a single mother.

There are many scriptures on marriage which I'm sure you are aware of, but also think of these:

1 Corinthians 13:4-8 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices in truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.

1 Philippians 4:8 Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things."

Tea Bag: Losing Sleep

Well, I have lost sooo much sleep this week stressing over curriculum for next year and other things so here is a little different tea bag:

"Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry abou itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matthew 7:27, 34

But, I'm a perfectionist, and I worry about today enough (and lose plenty of sleep.)

"Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you." I Peter 5:7

So you get to a point, you have had enough, and it's not worth worrying. I haved reached that point, and hopefully will sleep really well tonight!

Super Fling Boogie: Linen Closet

The Fly Lady issues a "super fling boogie" occasionally and that simply means that you go through your "stuff" and get rid of the unnecessary clutter. Well, that's what I'm doing to the various closets in our house; there's a lot of unnecessary stuff taking up some valuable storage real estate (which is why, in turn, my counters and hallways are so cluttered). This experience has been rather humorous so far--why, I repeat, WHY do we not only save such random things but then actually box them up and move them from house to house?! Craziness.

Here's what I threw away (or donated to Goodwill where appropriate) from my linen closet and regular clothes closet:

• 5 half-used bottles of foundation (I haven't bought any foundation/makeup in 5+ years, so this stuff was all definitely old...ditto for rest of the makeup listed)
• 6 mascara samples
• blush/makeup brushes losing bristles
• sponge rollers that didn't work the first time
• lipstick I can't believe I ever wore
• random blush and eyeshadow supplies
• lipliner
• various other makeup items (nail polish in nasty colors, etc.)
  
• extra long twin sheets from college (those who know me and my family will laugh at this: why I EVER thought I'd need extra long sheets for any of my family members is beyond me...)
• random hand towels that are tacky
• shoes I haven't worn in 4 years
• a pile of t-shirts, sweaters, skirts, and blouses that I wore when I was teaching school but now are completely unnecessary to my current existence as a stay-at-home wife/mom or are just too ratty to keep around
• baby gear that I've not used for the three babies I've had...so am unlikely to use for another should the Lord decide to bless us with another baby
  

Incidentally, I found it amusing to look at what I kept versus what I tossed (tossed makeup, nice/dry clean only clothes, and high heeled shoes). I kept: first aid stuff, extra towels, extra sheets, easy care clothes-->I suppose this is evidence that my career has changed from professional/work place to home and child care.

My next closet project: my downstairs hallway closet that is housing china, crystal, silver, and other "finery" that I received as wedding gifts, some of which Ihave never used and am not likely to in the near future..... (I do use my china, crystal, and silver patterns occasionally when I entertain; the myriad candlesticks, crystal bowls, vases, platters, and the like might be up for grabs.)

Savoring a Cup of Tea: Faith Pointes (Ch. 5: Finding Fullfillment in God Alone)

Carrie and I are working our way through Faith Pointes by Barbara Barker this summer; this is the second time we are both reading it, but the first time we're discussing the study/discussion questions. It's given me a lot to think about, so I thought I'd share! (Carrie will hopefully do some of the same...hint, hint--she's been so busy lately, but we all know she has a ton of great insight to share. At least she's reentered the world of cyberspace. )

This week, I'm in chapter five of Faith Pointes: "Finding Fulfillment in God Alone." Interestingly, I've been mulling over some of these issues already, so the application questions were really good for me to think about (haven't even gotten to the Bible study part!). Barbara lists our true needs (as opposed to wants): Redemption, Reason for living, Relationship, Requirements of physical life (shelter, food, water, etc.), and Refuge from all that threatens life. Interesting list, eh?

We spent some time with another family (who has a son our twins' age) at their mountain cabin a few weeks ago and had a wonderful time--refreshing in every sense of the word. I was pondering on the way home why it had been so wonderful. Partly it was because we were in the presence of friends, Christian fellowship, GORGEOUS creation, and away from internet/email, the phone, TV (at least TV with any real reception), even the radio. But, another reason it was so wonderful for me was that it reminded me of other times in my life when I've been the most content, really trusting the Lord for my needs and not fretting about all that was going on.

When were those times? For me, they are all strikingly similar once I examine them: a semester abroad during college, summers spent working at various camps, and some of the semesters immediately following college (I worked at the college for a few years and then taught school, so my life was run on "semesters" rather than on a yearly basis for a while). What do those things have in common? Few possessions, particularly the summers at camp and the time overseas. Limited availability to acquire more possessions. Few, if any, advertisements to urge me to acquire more possessions. A life fully immersed in ministry--all to other people, especially children. And, vast amounts of time spent in Creation (walking to and from work/class, working at a nature camp, living in cabins with no air conditioning and therefore lots of open windows, etc.).

I've realized that I tend to be more content, paradoxically, when I have fewer possessions. Perhaps it's because I don't have to spend as much time maintaining them (there are fewer things, after all, to maintain). I'm also been more content when I was living somewhere that I had very little choice about--it was the provided housing for that particular job. So, I wasn't consumed with decorating it or making it perfect. It was a pleasant place to live and that was it. Even food was pretty basic during my "seasons of contentment"--even when I had choice about it. And, Creation has a way of directing our hearts to its Maker rather than inspiring us to acquire more stuff (like watching TV does), so I really think my heart was turned to the Lord more, simply by being outside more. And, finally, I was investing much of my time and energy into fulfilling OTHERS' needs. Hmmm.....

With that in mind, I've begun (again) to try to simplify my life. Those who know me best know that this is a constant struggle/goal of mine. It's been interesting for me to start to ponder why I'm always wanting to simplify. I think I know a little bit better now: because when I'm living more simply, I'm truly more content, more inclined to worship and trust the Lord, and more interested in serving others rather than myself.

This is true for children, too--I've noticed that my daughter is much more content, sleeps better, plays independently better, when the TV has been off for several days, we're playing more outside, and there are fewer toys. So, I'm making an effort to simplify my children's lives as well. Why withhold something as wonderful as contentment from them?

I'll post some of my recent de-cluttering attempts later--it has been amusing me to look at all the JUNK we've acquired and then, actually boxed up and moved into this house!!! (sigh) Why do we hoard needless stuff?

Another Plug for Kids

Here is something else that is great if you are looking for a little extra with your kids. It is the Children's First Catechism. Betsy and I both grew up memorizing this. If you are not familiar with it, it helps your child memorize important truths about creation, sin & salvation, 10 commandments...just to name some. Kids as early as 3-4 years old can start memorizing the basic questions.

Mulling over Mary and Martha

I'm definitely a "Martha"--I like to be busy, and I'm one of those people who can usually get a lot done in the course of a day. In my current vocations of wife and mother, though, "getting a lot done" just doesn't fit. It's been a continual struggle for me not to fit my husband and children into my list of things to do. (Sometime later this week I'll post a little reflection I wrote back in February on my to do list--inspired by Arnold Lobel's Frog and Toad stories.)

Carrie's post earlier this week about Mary and Martha, coupled with the Faith Pointes book we're studying together this summer, has really got me thinking through my current priorities. I've come to this realization numerous times this year, but it just doesn't stick with me!

So many places in Scripture, we're urged to rest, to sit still before the Lord, to do His work, to focus on eternal priorities (Psalms, Colossians, Ecclesiastes all drive this point home). After a really bad day yesterday, I was doing my Faith Pointes study this morning (chapter 5--finding fulfillment in God alone) and praying through a little prayer guide I use (Face to Face, vol. 1). I was convicted about why my day had been so bad yesterday. Instead of focusing on the one boy who is teething (and therefore screaming randomly during the day and taking an extra hour to go to bed) and the toddler who seems bent on harming her younger brothers and disobeying Mommy in any and everything, I focused on my own sin: wanting to do something I thought would fun and worthwhile. What does the Lord want me to do? Spend time training my children, loving my husband, and ... resting before Him. What he has put before me to do is ultimately the most fulfilling, no matter how enticing something else looks.

So, with that in mind (and sorry for the long introduction to these), here are a few verses to leave you with from my day's reading (and a prayer from another guide I use occasionally: The Power of Praying Wife by Stormie O'Martian):

My soul silently waits for You alone, O God;
My salvation comes from You.
You alone are my rock and salvation;
You are my stronghold; I will never be shaken. (Psalm 62:1-2)

In repentance and rest is your salvation;
In quietness and trust is your strength. (Isaiah 30:15)

(Paraphrased from Day 9 of Praying Wife)
Lord, when You call us, You also enable us. Enable us to walk worthy of our calling and become the man or woman of God You made us to be. Continue to remind us of what You've called us to and don't let us get sidetracked with things that are unessential to Your purpose. Strike down discouragement so that it will not defeat us. Lift our eyes above the circumstances of the moment so we can see the purpose for which You created us. Give us patience to wait for Your perfect timing. I pray that the desires of our hearts will not be in conflict with the desires of Yours.

Children's Bible

We just got the ESV Children's Bible for our oldest son. His first real Bible (not just stories.) Check it out. It has tons of pictures and lots of extras. After looking at all the others, we definitely liked this one the best.

Teabag: Delightful Desires

Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart. Psalm 37:4

I have heard it said: if we truely delight in the Lord, the desires of our heart just might change. What we want, and what God wants aren't always the same. But his plan and path is always the best, and we can find that if we delight in him.

Somewhat Savoring a Cup of Tea

Well, this is Carrie. I know everyone has forgotten who I am :-). Summer and VBS, sports camp, mini vacation, etc. happened. Now I am in the process of gearing up for our first year of homeschooling. AAUUGGHH. I am chartering the unknown!

But here is my savoring. We have been going through a book, Treasures of Encouragement, in our Bible study this summer. One week we were talking about Mary and Martha, and how God wants what is best for us. That Martha could have had the attention from Jesus, even just by changing her heart attitude. And we talked about how as God's children, he always has our best in mind.

That led to, as parents, we always want what is best for our children as well. However, we tend to be Martha's and MAKE the best for our children: put them in the best school, play on the best teams, have the best friends, have the material things they need. Are we really wanting what is best for our children? In reality the best for our children is learning about and loving the same God we love, just like Mary. All the rest will happen, and the best path laid for our kids, by choosing to follow his guidance.

And if you are looking for ways to have your kids learn more about him...well look around you. "Spiritual" moments can happen anywhere. Who do you think created this world? We just had our kids at the zoo this weekend. It would have been a perfect opportunity to talk about how God created each one, or how they all fit on Noah's ark. (And to make you all feel better, we didn't think about that at the time.) And our 5 yr. old has been asking about how the moon, sun and earth rotate. Once again...who made them.

So take every opportunity, especially with school in the near future, to help your kids learn and love.

Fret Not

Psalm 37 starts out "do not fret because of evil men..." or something like that. I realize that this is taking this verse WAY out of context, but I can't resist. You see, this picture is of my dining room/play room area. My husband painted part of this room yesterday (that's a drop cloth over the table, not a table cloth). Why am I mentioning this? Because in approximately 1 1/2 hours, people will start showing up at our house for dinner.... There will be about 20 of us, including all the kids. Hmmmm.... somehow, this table is supposed to be back in its normal place and everything cleaned up. But, my three children happen to all be napping NOW. And they're due to wake up any time now.... I should be cleaning/setting the table instead of blogging! But, I can't! (sigh) I'm choosing not to fret. I'm sure it will all get worked out.

Going Green, part 10: Final Thoughts

I firmly believe the Lord has given us the responsibility of stewarding (exercising dominion over) his marvelous creation. Therefore, I think it's worth considering how we can be performing this calling to the best of our ability.

It's easy to point out the "big" and obvious sins, such as stealing, adultery, murder, etc. But, since we are all sinners, we all sin. And Scripture makes perfectly clear that greed, gluttony, and laziness are just as out of place in the Kingdom of God as stealing. I rather think that America, as a nation, has made convenience, acquisition, and over-consumption the norm rather than the exception.

Don't get me wrong: I can't imagine a picnic without paper plates. How did people pack school lunches before the invention of plastic, particularly Ziploc bags? And I'm ever so grateful for modern toiletry products. I think there's a time and place for convenience. Holidays and special celebrations have always been times of feasting. It's not wrong to give presents and to buy things. We're certainly going to be feasting this Friday for the 4th of July (and using plenty of paper products in the process).

But, there's always room for improvement in our stewardship of the Lord's creation. For instance, I need to be better about filling the sink up with water instead of simply letting the tap run whenever I wash dishes. I could take shorter showers. I end up wasting food. I throw away lots of paper when I'm too lazy to find the recycling area. But, viewing the earth as the Lord's and our role in it as stewards puts a different spin on the going green movement. In that mindset, I've tried to think of ways I can cut down on, say, my earlier massive paper towel use.

Being a good steward of something inevitably involves at least a little bit of work and sacrifice. Otherwise, people would have no trouble stewarding Creation. Frequently, being a better steward in the short run will reap rewards in the long run, so those little sacrifices and work will pay off in some way (think of farmers--they certainly put in the work upfront in order to reap a harvest!).

How can we, as stewards, manage our world better? What areas in your life are full of extravagant use or needless waste simply because you're lazy? Is there an area in which you can be a better steward of the portion of Creation the Lord has entrusted to your care? I hope this little series has encouraged you to think of something you can change or improve in this area.

Top Five Travel Tips (with Young Chidren)

Carrie and her husband have done more traveling than we have, so hopefully she'll post her top five tips as well--I'm sure she has some good ones! But, here are ours for travel with multiple small children. We have done sort distances (2 hours) and longer distances (8 hours) all by car. Flying with small children deserves its own list.

1. Pack an extra change of clothes for everyone that's easily accessible (i.e. not in the suitcase that's under the mountain of baby gear in the trunk). This should be a no brainer with young children, but it's very, very important! You never know when a child will throw up (possibly on you), have a "blow out" onto their clothes (and car seat), or simply get barbecue sauce all over them and a nearby sibling during a fast food pit stop.

2. Pack extra diapers/underwear. Sure, you can estimate pretty closely the numbers of diapers your child might need. Your practically potty trained child hasn't had an accident in weeks. But you never know what getting off your normal routine might do to said child.... Be prepared!!

3. Plan your trip around natural breaks/rest times for your child(ren). For short trips (2 hours or so), we often leave at the kids' bedtime, around 7:00 p.m. This way, we can put them in their pj's before we leave and we don't have to stop! For longer trips, we plan on having fairly significant meal stops and just don't sweat the time delay. Those kids need breaks from their confining car seats and a chance to stretch.

4. Car food: we adults all like our car food, eh? (My husband's road trip snacks of choice include Gobstoppers, Spree, and a soft drink). Likewise, food can go a long way toward entertaining your children. Forget about the health factor for the trip; just give them some crackers, pretzels, animal crackers, goldfish, etc. It doesn't really matter if they don't eat much at the next meal. It won't hurt them. In the same vein, bring sippy cups for the car so you won't have to worry about spills.

5. Security objects: Make sure you pack your child's favorite/necessary security objects. This includes his or her favorite stuffed animal, a special blanket, and favorite bedtime story. This also includes things like the small kid-sized toilet seat if you've just begun potty training, your child's pac-n-play if he or she has trouble sleeping in new places, a favorite food, and similar things. Think about the trip from your child's perspective and try to bring the things that will help him or her feel the most at home. Even if you're going to Grandma's, your young child might not remember having been there before (and might not even remember Grandma!). Your visit will be smoother if you try to troubleshoot homesickness and such issues before you leave.


Enjoy your trip!

Toddler-Friendly Restaurants

Are there any toddler-friendly restaurants? Better yet, are there any restaurant-friendly toddlers? Hmm.... For those brave enough to attempt going out to eat with young children, here are our family favorites (in no particular order):

1. Buffets (we have a Chinese buffet we particularly like; food is practically instant; you can get small servings of only the foods the toddler might like; most have SOMETHING your toddler can/will eat; our Chinese one only charges about $1/year of age... truly a bargain!)
2. Fast Food: most have healthy kids' meal choices now, especially Wendy's, Chick-Fil-A, and McDonald's. Chicken nuggets or even a cheeseburger paired with fruit and milk isn't too bad a deal. McDonald's has the BEST toys; Chick-Fil-A will let you substitute a small ice dream cone for the toy; Firehouse Subs even gives away kid-sized fireman hats. Chick-Fil-A wins this family's top vote, however, because they have bent over backwards to accommodate my crew--bringing us placemats that stick to the table, refilling our drinks (while we're at the table), etc. Three cheers for customer service and yummy food!!
   
3. Mexican Burrito Bars (Moe's, Salsaritas, Chipotle to name a few): these operate like Subway, only with burritos/tacos/quesadillas. Almost any toddler loves a cheese quesadilla and the prices for these are often pretty reasonable. Again, you get your food quickly.
4. Pizza Buffets: CiCi's is the best known one here. The pizza isn't outstanding, but again, you get your food quickly and in toddler amounts.
5. Small or Family-Owned Ethnic Restaurants: Believe it or not, many smaller ethnic restaurants are very accomodating to young children. Rice, beans, tortillas, etc. all are accessible to young children and generally available at ethnic restaurants. Go early and you'll likely get great customer service. It's also a fun chance to encourage your child to try something new. Our daughter once wolfed down a considerable portion of Chinese pork dumplings--who knew?!
   

Going Green, part 9: Technology

Technology can be a great aid in our efforts to reduce waste, recycle certain products, and reuse others. It can also be a great drain on resources, particularly power sources and the needless printing of documents just to read the latest version. Here are some things to consider as you try to practice the 3R's (reduce, reuse, recycle) with your technology use.

1. The Internet v. Regular Mailings: What a great tool to help us reduce our paper consumption and clutter! Use cyberspace wisely (especially as regards identity theft issues), but feel free to use it! Often a free service, you can have your bills and statements emailed to you or view them online at any given institution's website. I subscribe to very few magazines anymore because most of what I wanted is now available at the magazines' websites for free or for a reasonable subscription.

2. Digital File Storage: This can be on a website somewhere, your hard drive, or CD-Rom's. We've begun scanning in old financial statements/bills, converting them to PDF files, and then copying them to CD's. One CD can hold the same amount of information in so much less space than the paper versions. Now, we get our statements emailed to us and we can simply copy them over.

3. Digital Photo Storage: Many photo processing websites will also let you store photos for free on their website. We have ours stored on our hard drive and backed up on CD. We also have a number stored at our favorite processing site, where we've created photo books and calendars instead of having individual photos mailed to us for the "old-fashioned" albums. The books look great (and we've had hard copies of the books mailed to us)!

4. Media Storage: Wow! All our CD's are now on our computer thanks to my genius of a husband (who's an electrical engineer...). The CD's themselves are in the basement (we don't want to get rid of them because we feel like we're violating copyright laws). New music we've acquired through Mp3 format is also on our computer. Movies--same thing. In fact, through programs like Netflix, you can stream a number of movies and TV shows right to your PC.

5. Media "Hardcopy": CD's and DVD's can be resold much more easily than cassettes and VHS because they are more durable. When you're through with something, resell it or donate it so someone else can enjoy it!

6. Electronic Books: As a confirmed bibliophile (in one room alone of our house, we have 500 volumes...), I will never, ever want to have only e-books as an option. That being said, audiobooks can be acquired in Mp3 format; of that I heartily approve.

7. Libraries: Use them! You don't need to own every book (believe it or not, we do use discretion in which books we buy....).

8. Time Wasted...: I'm one to talk now that I have a few blogs going, but I do try to limit my computer time. When my husband has to work late and the kids are in bed, I'll "whip up" a couple of future posts and schedule them all. Sometimes, I'm not on the computer again for several days even though different posts will appear on schedule. Use all the latest technology well, but don't let it consume all your spare time. We must be stewards of our time as well as this earth.

9. Power Consumption: It's true. Even when they're in "standby" mode, our TV's, computers, DVD players, etc. all consume power. Anything with a clock in it and/or a remote control will be using power all the time simply to maintain those features. We've begun turning our computer off at night; my mathematically oriented husband has estimated this could save us as much as $30/month!

10. Resources: The Internet is full of wonderful resources to help you practice the 3R's--solutions for everything from homemade cleaning products, gardening help, facts and statistics on power usage, schedules for public transportation, homemade food products (instead of buying pre-packaged stuff all the time), electronic bill pay and magazine subscriptions as mentioned above, the yellow pages, stores from which to order things--or even simply the ability to look at a given store's inventory ahead of time (instead of driving all over town looking for one item), ...the list could go on and on. Make use of this resource if you have internet capability at your home. It can save you time and money as well as helping us conserve petroleum and other eco-friendly practices.

Savoring a Cup of Tea: Fruit of the Spirit (Faithfulness)

Faithfulness covers so many areas of life, doesn't it? I've been mulling over, in particular, the little areas of life that demand so much faithfulness--faithfulness that most people may never see. As a wife, mom, and homemaker, there are countless opportunities throughout the day for me to exhibit faithfulness to what the Lord has called me...or to shirk that calling and do something else (something that generally seems vastly more interesting).

For example, training my children: this is a huge, all-encompassing area for most parents, but especially in a house that's full of toddlers. We are training our children from birth to worship the Lord and serve him only, whether we realize it or not. Thus, each little interaction with my children is an opportunity to that end--and basic socialization in the process. How we encourage our children to interact with each other, how we model our reactions to frustrating events (including the mundane dropping of a kids' plate upside on the floor...), and how we demonstrate willingness to do menial tasks that serve the family at large are all making an impact on these little lives. When we do our jobs with faithfulness, that speaks volumes to little eyes and ears. They know no other standard than the one you maintain--at least during their early years. What an opportunity I have to be faithful in the little things these days! And how marvelous is the grace of God in the midst of my glaring unfaithfulness! I'm learning the value of faithful time spent with him, even in the early hours of the morning. I'm learning the value of faithful, consistent discipline and training of my two and a half year old, sometimes working with her on the same issues over and over. I'm learning the value of faithfully doing laundry--one load a day whether I like it or not--in order to better serve my family. I truly believe these small areas that demand faithfulness on a daily basis will teach us and our children great things about serving the Lord.

I read Isaiah 55:8-9 this morning:
For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,"
declares the LORD.

9 "As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts.

What a great reminder that the Lord chooses the context in which I am to be faithful, not me. I can envision all sorts of grandiose labors for the Lord, but he has called me to be faithful in my current situation, no matter how mundane that faithfulness may seem or feel at the time.

VBS Reachout Adventures

Carrie has been mighty busy these past few weeks, and one of her primary projects has been getting ready for her church's VBS. She's the "craft head trainer" or something like that. At any rate, I thought I'd do a little plug for the VBS curriculum they're doing. My mother-in-law happens to be one of the consultants for this EXCELLENT curriculum.

VBS Reachout Adventures is the name of the curriculum; this year's theme is "Olympion" and focuses on Joshua. (Of course it's supposed to tie in to the Summer Olympics). It just so happens that, long before I met my husband, I went to my grandmother's church's VBS and they were doing this exact program! It was an Olympics year, and they used VBS Reachout Adventures. So, I've had fun remembering all the things we did--I still sing some of those songs even though it's been 20 years since I learned them in VBS. I also still know the memory verses, particularly from Joshua 1. If you are at a church that is looking for a good VBS curriculum, file this away for next year! It's a lot of work to put together if you want to do it well, but SO WORTH IT. It's packed with Scripture memory, good teaching, drama, etc. etc.

So, there you have my plug. Carrie can of course fill us in after the week is over with how well it went. Maybe she'll even describe some of her cool crafts on Curing Boredom! (hint, hint)

Still in Play

I wrote about beginning the Great Gardening Game a few weeks ago. Well, we're still in play! We discovered our first tomatoes on... Friday, the 13th! Begone, ye superstition!

At any rate, we felt like parents all over again--our first little tomato babies. Now begins the really hard work--watching over these little guys and monitoring bugs, weeds, growth, etc. It's a lot like watching over wee people now that I think about it (except that the tomatoes will grant me a full night's sleep).

We didn't buy our starting plants and seeds from the organic aisle, but we have always tried to stick to organic means of maintaining our edible plants. We practice companion planting (flowers and other veggies with bug repelling properties), soap sprays, and old-fashioned weeding. Our flowers are seed-started this year, and a bit late at that, so I'm not sure they'll be flowering in time to do us any good! Oh well...we'll see. Maybe I'll end up writing a series of organic posts someday when I'm not slaving away in my little back 40 (feet, that is).

My toddler "helped" me sow some beans recently. I kept telling myself that the experience of being in the garden, handling the seeds, playing with roly-polies, and blowing bubbles is all more important than whether or not I end up buying green beans in the stores later this summer because our seeds fail to germinate.

Phase 0 was getting the ground ready (letting leaves compost there over the winter).

Phase 1 was planting.

Phase 2--they're growing! Peppers on the left, tomatoes in center and right. Cucumbers are in little hills scattered around, as are various herbs. Beans will (hopefully) be climbing the fences soon.

Stay tuned for the next phase: our first edibles!

Spiritual Mothering

We will be updating our resource of the month soon, so here's a brief review of our May selection: Spiritual Mothering by Susan Hunt.

This book is a great introduction and explanation of the Titus 2 model in Scripture: older women training younger women. As with most of her books, Hunt opens each chapter with a real-life story/example of the various principles talked about. She encourages each woman to be both a spiritual mother and a spiritual daughter--teaching those younger than us in the faith and sitting at the feet of those older than us. I have been blessed to have many spiritual mothers in my own life and am so thankful the Lord brought them into my life. This book would be a great study for a women in the church Bible study.

Sunday Morning Prep: Pew Time Cont.

I (Carrie), in response to Betsy's post, have a few suggestions for Sunday "pew" time. We had to go from total nursery, to having to stay in the entire service when our son was 4 due to our move/change in churches. Boy was it an adjustment for us all!! Here are some tips I have learned that have helped.

1. Instilling appropriate quiet times, i.e. prayer. We have really been working on our son sitting quietly and still during ALL prayers in the service. Praying is quite important.
2. Quiet toys. You can't expect young children to sit perfectly still for a 30+ sermon. Quiet toys include books, coloring books/drawing paper, puzzles, 1 or 2 "cars" (with no sound effects & nothing banging!). Biblically themed are added bonuses! You can even buy your child his/her own special Bible.
3. Take bathroom breaks during standing songs or offering time, and sit with accessibility to an exit.
4. Have silent discipline, like counting "1,2,3" with your fingers :-). Of course on 3 something has to happen, but do it once--they won't forget.
5. Be a little lax...they are kids. Kids=noise. Fortunately in our church we are not alone...everyone has too. And many parents start with kids 2-3 bringing them in just during song time. They are not going to understand the first time...you have to practice.

Sunday Morning Worship Prep.: Preparing Young Children

This would fall under the "blind leading the blind" category since we have only twice taken our toddler into church with us. The first time, she had spiritual Turrets syndrome: she would recognize a Bible and blurt out, "Bible!" during a nice, quiet prayer. Or, she would hear the pastor say, "Amen," and echo it loudly (in a Presbyterian service, echoing "amen" is just not done). The second time we tried it, she made it into the sermon....

Even given our daughter's charming recognition of all things spiritual, we feel we must begin this process. Sunday evening services seem an ideal place to begin because they are a bit shorter and there are fewer people to, ahem, "charm." I've been gleaning the following wisdom from a variety of sources, and am passing it on to any of our readers who will be facing similar situations in the future. If you have had success in this area (i.e. have a child who sits beside you on the pew making few disturbances and is genuinely eager to be in church), please share your insight in the comments!!

Parenting in the Pew: Guiding Your Children into the Joy of Worship by Robbie Castleman and Ruth Bell Graham
First, many people have recommended Parenting in the Pew. I've now read it and it is a great place to begin as far as perspective goes. For instance, my goal should not be a perfectly behaved child on Sunday mornings. Rather, my goal should be to instill in my children a love for and respect for the holy worship of God. (This goal covers everything from obedience in church to the tenor of your home before church on Sunday mornings.)

Second, several sources have pointed out that training your children in general obedience goes a long way towards a general display of obedience during the worship service. In other words, if my child doesn't obey me at home, why should she obey me during church?

Third, several have mentioned consistency. If you decide to take your child in for the first 1o minutes of the service, do it. Don't back down or not follow through one week because you are tired.

Fourth, practice! I have one friend who taught her 18 month old to "wait"--they practiced on their couch at home, beginning when he was much younger and with a very short time limit (1 minute). He had to sit quietly. When he was 18 months old, she was able to take him to a wedding! I have another friend who takes her children into the sanctuary and shows them what goes on (standing up, holding a hymnal, etc.). Then, they practice at home, so the child knows what to expect. I think this is a wonderful approach. Why don't we take a proactive, training approach to the things of the Lord like we might with school?

Fifth, of course, pray about it--this includes, for me, praying that my heart will be in the right place, that my motivation is not what other people think of me/making sure my child can sit in church by the "right age" (in our church, very young children often sit through the service), that I will truly set my eyes on eternal things--the condition of my child's heart instead of outward appearances, and that my child's heart will be softened to the things of the Lord.

Discovering the Toilet

Every soon-to-be toddler eventually discovers that you don't have to be in the bath to play with water! How exciting is that!?! And, it's right on your level, there's a lip to hang onto for better splashing leverage, and the lid moves! This is the greatest thing since, well, Cheerios.

Except when the slightly older toddler of the house has recently contributed some liquid of her own to the same source of water and forgotten to flush.... (sigh) One of my twins happily played around in this charming source of entertainment under these conditions before I discovered him.

Super Daddy

This is a little post in honor of my husband, aka "Super Daddy." All dads of multiples have to pitch in a wee bit more than dads of singletons have to--especially during the baby phase. And when there's a young toddler in the mix, well, that service is just downright mandatory. My hubby has earned a terrific Father's Day this year for all his hard work this past year. He's fed babies (even mastering bottle feeding two at once!), diapered babies, read stories, rough-housed, taken a toddler on countless Saturday morning errands to give Mommy a break, put kids to bed, walked with a stroller, carried a diaper bag, done nursery duty at church, cooked a lot of hot dogs and served up lots of grilled cheese sandwiches, .... The list could go on and on! Lots of times, he's done these things after a long day at work.

The latest feat of Super Daddy has been putting up a swing set. This isn't just any swing set. It's the Manchester II by Play Safe (shown in picture). All three of our kids can swing on it at the same time since we replaced the rings set with a swing (two swings are now infant swings). Happy Father's Day to Super Daddy!

Vacation Bible School

This is just a little plug for all the local VBS's. Most start at age 4/Kindergarten. However, if your child is younger (2-3 years) and you help volunteer, most VBS's will have a little miny program for them too. I did this when our oldest was this age. It is a great way to plug extra Bible lessons and songs, and I know few churches who will turn away volunteers :-).

Going Green, part 8: Lawn and Garden

Of course your lawn and/or garden are green, aren't they? Or are they?

Here are some tips to make the most of your natural resources and to reduce further, needless waste.

1. Xeriscape (I used to think this meant use gravel for mulch and plant only cacti, but it's really more aesthetically pleasing and common-sense oriented than that. In a nutshell, xeriscaping is planting plants and grasses that are native in your area because they are already well adapted to your particular climate--in particular, the amount of precipitation you get. For instance, hostas and lenten roses LOVE our yard. We transplant new ones/divide up older ones all the time; once they're established, we never have to water them again.)
2. Recyclable Pots (peat pots are commonly available now at most home and garden centers)
3. Water Wisely (covered under xeriscaping, too, but this is simply watering in the evening or EARLY morning when there is less chance of water evaporation)
4. Edible Gardens (sort of a no brainer--plant some food for you and your family to eat! Can, freeze, or give away excess)
5. Compost Yard Waste (we compost leaves and grass clippings in particular; both can provide great mulch and/or green matter for your garden. Some mowers and blowers come with mulching attachments)

South Beach Diet

Well, it's been more than a year since my twins were born; I've resigned myself to the fact that the extra pounds I'm still carrying can no longer be blamed on them. I've just been lazy and gluttonous (sigh). So, my husband and I are launching Phase 1 of the South Beach diet (we've done this diet in the past with great success). No time like the present, eh?

Any diet worth its salt will include lots of fresh produce. For Phase 1 of the South Beach diet, fruit is off limits (sigh), but in two weeks, we can bring on the peaches, cantaloupe, blueberries, etc. The picture above is from my morning run to our local produce market. It's cheery to see such beautiful colors all waiting to be sliced, diced, and served up. I'm encouraged to persevere.

Just had to share! Summer is a wonderful time to at least enrich the fruits and veggie side of your diet, even if you're not aiming to lose weight. So, take advantage of the glorious growing season and eat tomatoes, zucchini, peppers, and lettuces to your heart's content.

Road Trip Entertainment

If you have a road trip coming up, I highly recommend getting some books on tape/CD to listen to with your family! I've been listening to the Narnia books on CD for the second time this summer and am enjoying them just as much as the first go 'round (2 years ago). The set we have has the cover pictured with the original illustration of Aslan. However, HarperAudio has changed it to the movie shot of Aslan. The new cover is on the set of CD's narrated by current British actors/actresses (the other is an older recording, but probably equally as good--I haven't heard it). The narrators are EXCELLENT and include well known names such as Kenneth Branagh, Lynn Redgrave, Jeremy Northam, Derek Jakobi, etc. Even my toddler is enjoying them (although she doesn't really get the story line). We bought ours at Sam's--if you see one of these recordings for a good price, it will be worth it. You might want to check the list of narrators if you care whether or not you're getting the older or newer version.

Other good recordings of children's/young adult books include The Secret Garden, The Series of Unfortunate Events (narrated by Tim Curry--not the author), Stowaway (narrated by author Karen Hesse), Charlotte's Web, Harry Potter series... Just check your local library and see what they have!

Going Green, part 7: Toiletries and Cleaning Supplies

No, I'm not advocating only buying chlorine free toilet paper and all-natural toothpaste (although there are plenty of people who have chosen these means and love them). But, I would like to encourage you to think through what you can reduce, reuse, or recycle in this area of your life.

Think about it: our toiletries and cleaning supplies come all nicely packaged in containers we throw away when we're finished with said products. Toothpaste comes in tubes, shampoo and conditioner in bottles, deodorant in special deodorant containers, lotion in pump dispensers or tubes, and dental floss in little plastic dispensers. That's a lot of package waste when you think about it.

Before you throw everything out and make all your own toiletries, here are some easier "start-up" ideas to consider:

• buy shampoo/other hair products and cleaning supplies in bulk at beauty supply stores/warehouse clubs; keep a user-friendly amount in an old regular-size bottle
• don't buy what you won't use (don't keep trying random face creams, lotions, etc. that will only sit in your medicine cabinet or get thrown away)
• recycle what you can: plastic bottles, boxes from toothpaste tubes, etc.
• reduce the number of products you use (for instance, my husband and I both use the same kind of shampoo/conditioner; we now use Simple Green for just about every cleaning need--and vinegar, baking soda, ammonia, etc. will clean just about anything! See here or here for a sampling of ideas/formulas--note that I haven't tested all of these out yet, but they sound promising)
• use biodegradable products when you can (shampoos, dish soap, and such will list "biodegradable formula" on the back--you'd be surprised how many mainstream products fall into this category)
• buy toilet paper that doesn't waste paper (we all know that there are quilted, cushiony brands and the more boring, efficient Scott tissue--which, as you might expect, we use because it's cheap and is very septic-tank friendly (we used to have a septic tank))
• cloth rags as opposed to paper towels (many stores sell cleaning rags; old t-shirts, baby blankets, and cloth diapers also make great multi-purpose rags. We, of course, use blue towels for any and all uses! We also keep a stash of baby wash cloths in the kitchen to wipe off grimy hands/faces after meal times.)
• feminine hygiene products: believe it or not, there are options out there from cloth pads to chlorine-free biodegradable tampons (actually, an insightful article on the various options was posted at Wisebread.com); you might at least consider staying away from plastic tampon applicators and the like (and I'm certainly not giving up my disposable products for cloth in this category any time soon!!)
  

MORE Bug/Sunscreen

Though I will agree with Betsy-I have used the Bullfrog Mosquito Coast sunscreen in the past-I think Coppertone Bug & Sun warrants a picture as well. Here is why: It does contains DEET! Not good for too young of kids, however, we live by LOTS of woods. Our problem is not just mosquitoes, but LOTS OF TICKS as well! This seems to work better for us in our current situation. My only con against the Bug & Sun vs. Bullfrog: Bug & Sun is more greasy like sunscreen and Bullfrog you can get in the nice clear gel or spray.